


Not That Complicated

by grrriliketigers



Category: It's Complicated (2010), The Devil Wears Prada (2006)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-03
Updated: 2013-04-03
Packaged: 2017-12-07 09:02:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 34,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/746718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grrriliketigers/pseuds/grrriliketigers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When it came time to decide on a university both Priestly twins wanted to move to the west coast and become sunkissed California girls. Miranda stayed behind in New York but found that she was no longer as interested in running Runway. She'd felt that her reign was over and that she wanted to move on. Without the ties of friends or family in New York -- and with some encouragement from the girls -- she packed up and moved to California. It was in California that she met Jane Adler.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Meryl-on-Meryl

Miranda was walking down the street. She had a single goal -- which was to walk to Starbucks and purchase a piping hot latte. However, as her Armani sheathed legs carried her closer to her intended target she was distracted by the distinctive aroma of freshly baked buttery croissants. She stopped and smelled the air and just as Riding Hood was lured off the path after spring flowers so Miranda was by the promise of pastries. 

During her tenure at Runway she avoided carbs because they had a tendency to sit in her stomach and churn when her stress level rose. Having retired from the hustle and bustle she'd been slowly allowing some of her old favorites back into her life: toast, bagels, scones, croissants... 

Miranda stepped up to the counter and was greeted by a brightly smiling blonde woman. Miranda judged her to be mid to late fifties, she was pretty in a roman way. Miranda managed a small smile, "I need a latte. _Hot_ latte."

The woman scribbled the order down on the paper, "center of the sun hot latte," she smiled. 

"And," Miranda started, as though feeling guilty she were about to admit it out loud. "I was enticed in by the smell of baking croissants..." 

The woman nodded knowingly. "The croissants," she looked at her watch, "are going to come out of the oven in two minutes. If you'd like to sit for a few minutes I could bring it over to you." 

Miranda surprised herself by nodded, "yes, that would be fine." 

"Would you like the latte for here or to go?" 

Miranda hesitated. She was going to say to go but realized she wasn't in any hurry and she did have a book in her purse. "For here." She said. 

The woman handed her a number, "I'll bring that right over to you." 

Miranda took a seat at a small table. She indulged in a look around the room; it was spacious, the tables in the room didn't overtake the space and somehow the mountain of baked goods in the middle wasn't overpowering either. 

She sighed contentedly and found that the less hectic pace of this Santa Barbara cafe would suit her just fine in her retirement. 

After a few minutes the woman approached the table with a steaming hot latte and a warm croissant on a plate. Miranda accepted the items and sipped the coffee, the hot liquid searing her tongue. Her eyes widened and then her eyebrows went up in surprise.

The woman looked concerned. "Too hot? Can I get you ice water?" 

"No," Miranda put an arm on the other woman's arm. "I think this is the best coffee I've ever had."

The woman's face flooded with relief and she smiled. "I have a secret ingredient."

"Which is?"

She grinned, "a secret." 

Miranda took another sip, her expression giving away her serenity. 

The woman touched Miranda's shoulder, "if there's anything else I can do for you don't hesitate to ask." 

"Thank you." She said, the words foreign to her own ears. She watched the woman's retreating form before returning to her latte and opening her book. 

**

The next morning the bakery was Miranda's intended target instead of Starbucks. She stepped up to the counter when it was her turn and was greeted again by the blonde woman.

"Vanilla?" Miranda asked.

"Pardon?" The blonde furrowed her brow. 

"Your secret ingredient." Miranda smiled charmingly. Miranda's eyes flitted to where her nametag would have been and was surprised that she wore no such tag.

The woman smiled back and shook her head, "no, sorry." 

"Well, in that case I'll take another latte and a croissant." 

"Coming right up." 

**

On the third day Miranda didn't meet up with the blonde woman at the bakery so she sipped her latte and ate her croissant with a distinct feeling of melancholy. 

**

On the fourth day the temperature had dropped. To Miranda's North Eastern skin it was temperate and perfect but the natives she passed on the street were bundled up in sweaters and scarves. 

She entered the bakery, the bell dinging to announce her presence. She smiled inwardly when the blonde woman greeted her from behind the counter. "Aren't you cold?"

"Quite comfortable actually. I'm not from around here. Anise?" 

"No but that sounds delicious." She grinned. 

"I'll figure it out yet. I'll take a latte and a croissant." 

**

The fifth day Miranda walked in several hours later. A few early morning phone calls from the east had deterred her. 

The blonde smiled when Miranda stepped up to the counter. "I thought you weren't coming in today." She admitted. 

"Just late." Miranda smirked mischievously. "Molasses?" 

The woman chuckled and shook her head, "no. Your usual?" 

**

The sixth, seventh and eighth days went similarly. Miranda would attempt to guess the secret ingredient, the woman continued to shoot down each guess. The ninth day the blonde wasn't there to greet her or hear her guess. 

On the tenth day Miranda walked up to the counter, "garlic?"

The woman laughed, the sound of which settled in Miranda's core. The woman shook her head, "now you're just being silly."

"Would you even tell me if I got it right?" Miranda teased.

"Maybe..." the woman grinned coyly. "I don't think you'll figure it out though."

"I'm always up for a challenge." Miranda smirked. "I didn't catch your name."

"Jane." She smiled, "Jane Adler." 

"Miranda Priestly." Miranda extended her hand and shook with Jane. "Nice to meet you." 

"Can I get you your usual?" 

Miranda nodded, "please." 

**

"You own the bakery." Miranda announced as she stepped up to Jane on the eleventh day. 

"I do." Jane smiled, "the culmination of my life's passion. You googled me, didn't you?"

Miranda felt a slight blush color her cheeks. "I did." 

Jane's cheeks were similarly colored, "I googled you too." Jane pushed her hair behind her ears. "The mysterious woman who sits in my bakery for hours on end with a molten cup of latte, a croissant and reads philosophy books. Of course I googled you." 

"I guess I have one question." Miranda announced, "why do you toil away here when you own the whole lot?" 

"Honest?" Jane laughed embarrassedly. "I'm having work done on my house and... I used to date my architect and it ended... weirdly. Besides all that I like to work, I love my bakery. I still bake half of the food we sell." 

"Baking is done in the morning, isn't it?" Miranda looked at her watch. "It's eleven now. How long will the architect be at your house?" 

Jane chuckled, "until three at least." 

"So that's four hours for us to go get lunch and do a little shopping." Miranda announced. 

Jane watched Miranda for a moment. "Ordinarily," she began as she untied her apron, "I would say no but I read about your reputation for not taking no for an answer." 

"Nice to know my influence is so far reaching." Miranda smirked. 

"I'm just going to tell my kitchen manager that I'm taking off." Jane stashed her apron underneath the counter. "And get you your latte to go." 

Miranda winked as Jane disappeared into the kitchen. Miranda couldn't stop the grin that spread across her face. Miranda missed having friends. In New York Miranda had lunch, on occasion, with Donatella Versace, Anna Wintour and Patrick Demarchelier but she never felt sure of their intentions; mostly because she knew hers weren't entirely pure. 

Jane, and indeed all the Californians she'd met so far, was refreshingly different. They seemed friendlier and calmer than New Yorkers, they seemed more zen. 

Jane broke through Miranda's musings, pulling on her coat. 

Miranda smiled, "Jane, it's sixty five degrees outside." 

Jane shrugged, pulling on her hat, "I know." 

Miranda laughed, "you don't need the hat."

"Not all of us are used to living in the arctic." Jane quipped, "oh, your latte." She reached back around to the counter and produced it. 

Miranda accepted it gratefully. "New York is the arctic now?"

"Might as well be. The ice caps are melting so New York is probably about the same temperature, right?" Jane teased. 

"You're lucky you're cute." Miranda said before she could think better of it. Miranda felt herself blush and she looked away when Jane looked back at her. 

"You're not so bad yourself, Priestly." 

**

Miranda hadn't found herself genuinely interested in what someone else had to say for a very long time. She loved her daughters dearly but found most of their stories of being middle school, high school and now college students rather boring -- though she put up a good front and did genuinely like talking with them even if the subjects were banal. All three of her marriages likely broke up because when all was said and done she didn't give _a rat's ass_ what they were doing with their lives. Barring that she didn't like listening to excuses, she didn't like listening to the catty banter of fashionistas and divas. Miranda was more of a silently calculating fashion dictator; silence is golden. 

Today, however, Miranda found herself alight with excitement to sit down and talk with Jane Adler: to hear her stories, to hear her thoughts. She wanted to have a real, honest to God _conversation_ with her. 

Miranda stepped up to the podium as Jane was hanging up her coat. "Two for lunch." 

"I'm sorry, you need a reservation." The man smirked apologetically. 

"I am Miranda Priestly." Miranda watched him with confusion.

He mirrored said confusion back at her. He looked down at the reservations book in front of him, "I can give you a table around two?" 

Jane walked up to the podium at that moment and smiled, "is there a problem?" 

"This gentleman will not give me a table." Miranda pursed her lips. 

"Jane Adler." Jane said to the man. "I should be able to get a table."

"Of course, Ms. Adler, if Ms. Beasely had said she was dining with you..." he looked apologetic. 

Miranda had to reel in the impulse to kill him. " _Priestly_." She clarified, trying not to grit her teeth. 

"I am sorry." He grabbed two menus and led them to a table. "Your waiter will be right with you." 

Miranda was stunned. She was too surprised to be angry. "How did you do that?" 

Jane looked up from her menu, "it's sort of a restauranteur professional courtesy. I've known the manager here for years. We go way back." Jane squinted at the menu and frowned. "I forgot my glasses."

Miranda pulled a pair of purple, thin-rimmed Chanel glasses from her purse and held them out to Jane. "Try mine." 

"Don't you need them?" She asked as she accepted them. 

"I think I can do without with..." Miranda squinted at the menu and then held it further away. 

Jane laughed, "you know what? I've eaten here before, I'll just get something I can guess is on the menu." She pulled the glasses off of her face and handed them back to Miranda. 

"Two intelligent women, one pair of glasses and we can't figure out how to read the menu simultaneously." Miranda scoffed. 

"Well, the obvious answer would be to have _two_ pairs of glasses, wouldn't it?" Jane shrugged. 

"But that's adding in a resource that we don't have. There must be a way to do this with only the things we have..." 

"You could read the menu out loud." Jane suggested. 

"I could pop out one of the lenses." 

Jane frowned, "then you might not be able to get it back in. I think we should stay away from the defacing of the only pair of glasses between us. We could sit next to each other and use the glasses as a magnifying glass." 

Miranda smiled and nodded, "I think you've got it," Miranda pushed her chair further to the side so Jane could move hers next to Miranda's. 

Jane sidled up, their arms brushing against one another. From their close proximity Miranda could smell Jane clearly. She smelled faintly of lavender body wash, tea tree oil shampoo and butter from the bakery. 

Jane turned to Miranda, startled at first by how close their faces were. Jane smiled and tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. 

Miranda looked down to the menu as a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. She held her glasses near the page magnifying the words in a fish-eye shape. 

The waiter came to the table and filled their glasses with water. "Are you ladies ready to order?"

Jane chuckled, "I think we're going to need a few minutes actually." 

**

"Did you study anything else?" Jane asked after she'd finished a bite of her Pasta Primavera. "I just ask because you seem to be engineer, or at least mathematically, inclined. Plus I've seen you with three different philosophy books in under two weeks." 

"What do you mean _else_?" Miranda furrowed her brow. 

"Other than Fashion." Jane clarified. When Miranda still appeared confused, Jane continued. "At college?"

Miranda shook her head, "I didn't go to college but I've always had a head for numbers and pragmatics. I realized early on that I had an eye for trends." 

"Well, obviously a very good eye for trends. How else could you have run a fashion magazine for so long?"

"I actually don't mean fashion." Miranda admitted, "I just mean trends in general, which products will become popular, if and when they will decline, when old trends come back, people's reception of new products and ideas. When I moved from New Jersey to New York I started playing the stock exchange and I made a lot of money. After I realized I was good at it, and it wasn't just coincidence after coincidence, I decided that I wanted to work for the business publication at Elias Clarke publishing but I was turned down because I didn't have a business degree. Though out of consideration that I was becoming quite wealthy I was given the position at Runway. It was, at the time, a very minor publication and I exacted my revenge by turning it into the leading fashion magazine in the US and exceeding my alotted budget every week." 

Jane grinned, "what was the business publication called?"

Miranda shrugged, "you know I can't even remember. It folded two years after I applied to it." 

"How come none of that story is in your biography?" 

"Because I changed my name after I made my first million and later a biographer judiciously rewrote my past without consulting me considering he couldn't _find_ my past." 

"Why did you change your name?" 

Miranda smiled tightly, "enough about me. I want to hear more about you. You have children. Tell me about them." 

Jane smiled and nodded, not offended by Miranda's subject change. "I do have children, they're 22, 24 and 26. My youngest, Luke, went to college in New York, actually, and he just graduated this past May. He got a BFA in creative writing but he hasn't started the novel he's been talking about since before college. He's working as a manager of a local bookstore. Lauren, my oldest, is studying to get her law degree, following in her father's footsteps. She just got married to her high school sweetheart in July, he worked for me throughout college, he's an IT specialist. My middle child, Gabby, is the only one I really worry about. She often has a hard time focusing on anything; I'm always worried I'm going to get a phone call that she was in a horrible accident because she was texting and driving. She got her degree in history and she's been bouncing around from job to job." 

Miranda nodded, "just to play devil's advocate, I feel like I'd have similar reservations about my daughters flying off to study cooking. Considering the rate that restaurants fail you've actually beat the odds. You started out with a product that 90% of the population drink but did it uniquely enough that you stood out and now you thrive not only on that solidly built reputation but the trend of eating locally. It's very probable that if you had started your business anywhere else at any other time that you would have failed." 

"I guess I have to take your word for that considering you've made a lot more money on the stock market than I have but I did secure a following when I ran a catering business." 

"But a catering business is different than an established bakery and cafe." Miranda insisted, "first of all, I drank Starbucks religiously in New York, I would never consider Starbucks as a possible caterer. In fact, most caterers with whom I've done business seem to make an abysmal coffee because it's not their primary product. The last couple of years in New York I used the same caterer for all of my Runway functions and I would _never_ patronize their cafe if they opened one. _Maybe_ your reputation as a chef brought people to the bakery and the coffee keeps them coming. Cafes are interesting because once people decide they like their coffee they patronize the one establishment with a ferocity that is rivalled only by religious conflicts." 

"You should write a book." Jane grinned. "I love listening to you talk." 

"Quelle coincidence," Miranda smirked, "I love hearing myself talk, too. However, I'm curious why you keep turning the conversation back on me. I want to hear more about you."

Jane hesitated and then looked away shyly. "Well, my psychiatrist says that I have an inferiority complex... but I don't think I feel inferior... I think that I just have a fear of being boring." 

"How about you give it a try and I'll stop you if I start falling asleep." Miranda sipped her water. "Tell me about your decision to go to Le Cordon Bleu." 

"My parents both worked a lot and I usually made dinner for my brother and myself. I was good at it and I really enjoyed it so I decided I wanted to study it and really perfect my craft. My parents thought it was a waste of time. My father thought that it was impractical, he wanted me to do something that would 'guarantee' me a job. I think he basically wanted me to go to trade school, to be a nurse or a paralegal or any of those jobs you see on the community school commercials. My mother didn't mind the idea of me going into cooking as a career but she thought it was a waste of time and resources to go to school for something I was good at already." Jane shrugged, "being a teenager I rushed off to France with all my graduation money and my savings. I just knew it was something that I needed to do. I needed to study cooking in France with masters of the craft... you know?" She added self-consciously. 

Miranda nodded, "absolutely. It's similar to why I played the stock market in New York instead of from my home in New Jersey. Go on." 

Jane stopped to gather her thoughts, "well, I lived in an apartment with several other women in my classes and there wasn't a minute of the day that our apartment didn't smell like food. Because of our supplemental jobs we all had wildly different schedules and we were never all there at the same time. Which was good because I can't swear that there were as many beds as there were tenants." Jane laughed, "it made it cheap though. We all needed as much money as possible to pay for food."

"Did you all guard your food or did you let the others share in your culinary triumphs?" 

"We were all pretty good about sharing. Like I said, we never had to feed everybody. If one of us was cooking and then another came in they were usually invited to join. It's like a painter keeping their paintings locked away or a writer never letting anyone read their work." 

Miranda nodded, "indeed." 

"It took me a while to really get off the ground. I didn't make a million dollars in my early twenties," she teased goodnaturedly. "I carved out a meager existence for a while and I was working with a catering company when I met my husband who was just starting out at a law firm. He was very green but he was funny and charming. I have a love-hate relationship with him because he did cheat on me but he is a good father to our children and he can be a good guy but he just... I don't know, he has deep rooted character flaws that I doubt he'll ever grow out of." 

Miranda nodded knowingly. "Several of my husbands have said that about me." 

Jane laughed, "you're funny." 

"I've never been accused of that before." Miranda grinned wryly, feeling her playful side reappearing for the first time in a decade. 

Jane laughed harder. 

The waiter stopped at the table and laid down the folder with the check. "I'll just leave this with you, take your time." 

Miranda and Jane both reached for it. Miranda's hand landing on it first, "I've got this, I invited you to lunch." Before Jane could offer protest Miranda finished by saying, "I insist." 

"Very well." Jane smiled, "then I'll just have to pick up the tab after tomorrow's lunch. That is... if you're free."

"I'm sure I can find some time in my busy schedule." 

**

On the twelfth, thirteenth and fourteenth days Miranda met Jane at the bakery and lured her away for lunch. Miranda quickly became comfortable with Jane and felt herself able to open up as Jane opened up to her. Jane had at first been intrigued by the mystery of Miranda and felt that she very much enjoyed finding out new things every day. The things she discovered were endearing and sweet; on the internet she'd read that Miranda was considered to be an odious tyrant of the worst sort and couldn't imagine anyone thinking that about the warm, caring woman that sat across the table during their lunches. 

On the fifteenth day Miranda sat across the table swirling spaghetti around her fork. "So Caroline broke up with Julio but she set him up with Cassidy." 

Jane laughed out loud, covering her mouth in a vain attempt to contain the sound. "She didn't!" 

Miranda chuckled and shook her head, "yeah, that's my girl..." Miranda ate the spaghetti then continued, "but Cassidy was mad when she realized he was, how did she put it?, 'Caroline's cast-off.'" 

Jane laughed harder. "Your daughters are like a soap opera." 

"A _bad_ soap opera maybe."

"Are there good ones?" Jane snorted a laugh. 

"Good point." Miranda conceded with a smile. 

"I don't think Luke and Gabby are dating at the moment... or at least they wouldn't tell me if they were. It's nice that you and your girls are so close." 

Miranda nodded, "it has a lot to do with the fact that I was so busy in New York. Most children are bored of their parents attentions but we were all grateful for the time that I did have to spend with them. I think if I had it to do over again I would have tried harder to be there more often." 

Jane nodded, "I try not to live in the past but this last year I've been thinking about all the things I wish that I'd done differently."

"Because of the fling with your ex." 

Jane fiddled with her napkin, "yeah... because of that. I regretted that I participated in adultery and I regretted treating Adam poorly because I was mad at Jake. I also feel like I've been regretting ever marrying Jake in the first place." 

"You shouldn't. As someone who's been married three times I can say that I don't regret marrying any of them. It's been my policy to never regret love. What I regret is hating Lucas towards the end and how that affected the girls, I regret hating Stephen for asking me to foresake my job. I don't regret that the relationships ended but I regret that I wasn't able to be the bigger person." 

"I regret forgiving him for cheating the first time. I think that breaks your rule." 

Miranda shrugged, "unless you didn't do it because you loved him. If you forgave him because it was too scary to be alone that's another story. Unfortunately, cheaters always cheat. Liars always lie." 

"Yeah." Jane sighed. 

"But on the bright side we're two strong women who have managed to overcome most, if not all, of our feelings of co-dependency with men. That has to count for something." 

Jane smiled then. "You're right. You're absolutely right. I slept with Jake because I was _horny_ ," she blushed at the word, "not because I felt incomplete without a man." 

"I'll drink to that." Miranda flagged down the waiter, "two white peach sangrias, please."

Jane giggled, "Miranda, it's the middle of the day." 

Miranda shrugged nonchalantly, "it's juice." 

When the sangrias arrived Miranda slid one across the table to Jane. Jane eyed it lustfully and finally accepted it. Miranda held hers up, "to not confusing sex with men." 

"I'll drink to that," Jane laughed and blushed and sipped her sangria. "Damn, that's good!"

**

Jane arrived at her session with Dr. Nemo with a box heath crunch cookies. He glanced down at the box and back up at Jane. "Uh-oh." He laughed, "what do you have to confess?" 

She sat down on the couch and set the box on the table between them. He closed the door and took his seat and bit into a cookie.

"I'm still avoiding Adam. I spend the morning in the bakery and I go out to lunch every day with Miranda and she and I while the day away walking around, talking and shopping and... it's wonderful. I love spending time with her." 

He nodded, "but you feel guilty for avoiding Adam?" 

"I don't. I did at first. You know, because he was so classy about it? I also felt bad about myself because he didn't want to try again... but I'm over that now. That's his trust issue not my problem. I know that I'm an attractive person and my self worth isn't wrapped up in someone else's view of me." 

"I'm proud of you for recognizing that, Jane." He started in on another cookie. "But I don't know why you brought me the cookies if you're not feeling bad about yourself. You usually only bring baked goods when you don't feel sure of yourself." 

Jane bit her lip, "okay... yeah... here's the thing... it's Miranda." 

He waited for her to continue but found he had to give her a gentle nudge, "what about Miranda?"

"She's... she's... we were shopping last week at that consignment shop I like and I pulled this cute blouse off the rack and she goes 'no, no, Jane, please, I vetoed that blouse two years ago. The lines in it make the wearer look flat and featureless and the pattern detracts from the bosom. Good fashion should enhance the wearer's features.' So I didn't get the blouse and then the next day she brought a bag with her to lunch and I was dying to see what was in it and just as we were going to part for the day she hands me the bag and tells me I can open it. I pull out a gorgeous cerulean blue cashmere sweater and a charcoal grey silk skirt and finally a pair of kitten heel shoes. I ask her why she's been carrying it around and she says it's for _me_. I tell her that I obviously can't accept it because it's too expensive but she talked me into keeping it and I tried them on when I got home and they fit me better than anything I've ever bought for myself. The lines of the skirt were so slimming and the belt for the sweater... I have never worn anything nicer."

"And you feel bad that you aren't able to pick out clothes that are as nice." He suggested. 

Jane shook her head, "no. She's made a living out of fashion, I don't feel inadequate because of it... it's just that it was so... so... _incredibly thoughtful_... and they fit so well it was like she'd memorized my body... like she knew every inch of me..." she admitted breathily. 

Dr. Nemo nodded, starting to see where it was going. 

"And..." Jane bit her lip on a broad smile and blushed, "it was... a turn on. She's... she's _gorgeous_ and... she likes _me_. It makes me feel... interesting and beautiful and... she makes me feel really good." 

"Are you interested in pursuing a relationship with her?" 

Jane's foot started to bounce nervously, "that's when I start getting nervous. What if she says no? What if she says _yes_ and it turns out that I don't like... having... sex with a woman?" 

"Well," He leaned back in his chair, "the most important thing is to be completely up front with Miranda, let her in on how you're feeling and you should be fine regardless. She doesn't sound like a judgmental person."

"Yeah... she doesn't act like a judgmental person but I told you I googled her? She's got this reputation for being an incredible hardass. The internet is loaded with page after page of articles and blog entries about how horrible she is. How can two people know such different sides of a person?"

"Be careful about how much stock you put in what you read on the internet. You don't know the whole story. You _can't_ know the whole story because you weren't there. Try to forget all of those things you read because the only Miranda that's important is the Miranda that spends her afternoons with you and opens up to you. You shouldn't ever be afraid to be honest with your friends, right?" 

Jane nodded slowly, "yeah, I guess you're right." 

"You guess?" He teased.

Jane smiled, "you're right. I guess I was just panicking. I've never even considered that I might want to be with a woman. That scares me. How can I go through life not knowing something about myself?" 

"Actually, it's quite common for women to realize later in their lives that they're interested in women. Also, I'd like to emphasize that it doesn't negate relationships you've had in the past. Sexuality is a very subjective concept that's been polarized and we don't really have the language to label everyone's sexuality. You're not suddenly a lesbian because you're attracted to a woman and you definitely shouldn't think of it as a sexual identity crisis. I'm very proud of you for being able to openly talk about your attraction."

Jane smiled. "Thanks. That actually makes me feel better." 

"I'm glad. In fact you should read some of Alfred Kinsey's writings on sexuality. Because sexuality exists on a spectrum and because of the nature of bell curves it is less likely to find people rigidly at either end. So it is actually more normal to have some feelings for Miranda than to never have any feelings for women." 

Jane smiled more confidently, "I think I'll talk to Miranda tomorrow..."

**

"Is everything alright?" Miranda furrowed her brow. "You've hardly said anything since we left the bakery." 

Jane nodded, "I'm fine. I'm just... my throat's a little dry. Does that ever happen to you? Your throat just..." Jane took a moment out in her sentence to chug half of her water. "Goes dry? For no reason?" 

Miranda nodded indulgently, "mhm." 

"You were... saying something? About Caroline and Cassidy?" Jane asked, downing the rest of her water. 

"Yes," Miranda smiled, "I'm going to take them to LA this afternoon to go shopping." 

"Aren't there places to shop that are closer?" 

Miranda waved her hand dismissively, "the stores they want to visit are in LA. You know teenagers; once they get an idea in their heads they're hard to deter." 

"Amen to that." Jane was slowly starting to relax. 

"So I'm going to have to leave a little early today." 

"Oh." Jane's heart leapt into her throat. "So, when you were running the magazine, was there ever a time when it was time for the magazine to go to print but you didn't feel ready?" 

Miranda nodded, "once or twice. I tried to always work out the problems earlier in the month." 

Jane bit her lip, "did you ever... like you thought it was July and you'd have thirty-one days but then you realized it was June and you only had thirty?" 

Miranda laughed, "I don't think I ever had that problem; either way, one day doesn't usually make or break the issue. Is there something you're trying to tell me?" 

Jane opened her mouth to speak. Her heart yelled yes but as she tried to speak the word it somehow came out, "no..." 

"If there was something wrong, you'd tell me?" Miranda laid her hand over Jane's. 

Jane softened, she smiled and looked up at Miranda. "Yes." She was desperate to change the subject, "I can't believe you're going to LA for the evening."

"My GPS said it would be about two hours." Miranda shrugged, "I might stop by and see Sophia Loren if she isn't busy." 

"Oh to be you!" Jane grinned, "you know Sophia Loren?" 

Miranda nodded, "with her permission I designed a tribute issue to her timeless style and since then she and I became friends. In the sense that I have friends, of course."

"Well, I can promise that you have at least one friend that cares about you very much." 

Miranda smiled and gave Jane's hand a gentle squeeze. "Maybe it's time we take our relationship to the next level."

Jane's throat went dry again. "I... wow, I couldn't agree more... I'm so glad you said it first."

Miranda pulled her cell phone from her pocket and started typing, "exchanging phone numbers. Mine's 217 555-6871." 

"Right..." Jane shook her head clear, bouncing back from the obvious miscommunication. She flipped her phone open, asked Miranda to repeat and entered it. "I'm 805 555-5263. It's easy to remember, the numbers spell Jane if you look at the keypad." 

"That's cute. Accident or on purpose?" 

"On purpose. Jake thought it would be great if he got all our numbers to be our names, or at least four letters of them. Lauren's not on our plan anymore. Neither is Jake but he kept the number." 

Miranda held up her phone, "smile."

"What?" Jane laughed, embarrassed. 

"I like to have an id picture for all the people in my phone. Let me take a picture." At Jane's visible reluctance she added, "if you don't let me take a picture I'm going to take a picture of the potted cactus in the foyer and I'm going to forever associate you with the desert." 

Jane laughed embarrassedly again. "Okay, you can take my picture."

Miranda snapped the shot while she was laughing. Miranda smiled at the picture, "beautiful. I don't know why you don't like having your picture taken." 

Jane blushed, "I don't know... I just never really have..." 

"Would you like to join us?"

"Oh, that's really sweet..." Jane bit her lip.

Miranda smirked, "you're probably sick of me by now, right?" She teased.

"No, not at all." She said quickly. Maybe too quickly. "No, it's just that I don't want to intrude." 

"You wouldn't be intruding. You'd be saving me from having to listen to college girl drama the whole evening. And I get to see them several times a week. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I would love another adult as company and I would love it if that company is yours." 

Jane smiled shyly. "Yes, I'd love to spend the evening with you." 

**

Miranda deposited the girls at their respective dorm buildings before heading for Jane's house. The trunk was full of purchases and the girls had spent a lot of the ride with their purchases underfoot and forming a wall between them. 

Jane was stunned at the ability of a Priestly woman to walk into a store, pick up everything that interests them and throw money at the sales clerk. She would have been more apt to shop had she not been nervous about her self-imposed ultimatum to tell Miranda she was romantically interested. The girls were outgoing and confident just like their mother. They talked to Miranda, they talked to Jane, they talked to people in the stores that were wearing cute outfits. They just talked, they were marathon talkers. They would get along very well with Gabby; Jane hoped one day to introduce them. 

Miranda was suppressing a yawn when she pulled into Jane's driveway. 

Jane picked up her lone bag from the floor by her feet and unbuckled her seat belt. "Why don't you come in for a quick cup of coffee? You're yawning and I don't want to send you off like that. I would worry." 

Miranda smiled, "you are such a mother." She said as she parked and unbuckled. 

Jane led them into the house, turning on the lights as she went. "Please excuse the relative chaos. Part of the addition is my new kitchen so the existing kitchen is getting a little crazy." 

"You have a lovely home." 

"Yeah, well, I like it. I bought it myself. I like what it represents: my independence. Financial, if not emotional." She joked. 

Jane laughed nervously. "I'll, uh, I'll just put that coffee on." Jane moved to the Mr. Coffee sitting on the counter. "Strong and hot, right?"

"Right." Miranda smiled. "Are you going to make it like you make it at the bakery?"

"That depends. Will you shut your eyes while I make it?" Jane laughed. 

"Sure." Miranda closed her eyes. 

Jane grinned, "you don't have to close your eyes."

"Good. I wasn't going to keep them closed anyway." Miranda admitted mischievously. 

"But you have to take a solemn oath of secrecy. I take my coffee very seriously. Raise your right hand," she waited for Miranda to comply. "I do solemnly swear that I will tell no one what I see here tonight."

Miranda laughed, "I will tell no one what I see here tonight."

"On threat of death I will not reveal the secret." 

"What if I make someone take the oath?"

"Only I can administer the secret. Repeat." Jane insisted. 

"On threat of death I shall not reveal the secret. I think it sounds better that way." Miranda chuckled. 

Jane grinned, "okay. Here goes." She turned back around to the coffee maker and opened the two canisters directly next to it. She scooped one scoop from each to the basket and closed the lid. In the pot she put two teaspoons of salt from a jar with Japanese labeling. 

"Salt?" Miranda furrowed her brow.

"You guessed _garlic_!" Jane reminded with a snort. "It's aguni sea salt, it's Japanese and it reduces the acidity of coffee. The coffee itself is half Emerald City which is a rich, dark Colombian and Northwest Escape which is a little sweet but also full-bodied." 

"So you actually had multiple secret ingredients. If I'd known I would have guessed differently. You cheated." Miranda feigned hurt. 

"You guessed _garlic_!" Jane laughed. 

Miranda joined in the laughing, "okay. So I'm no Rachel Ray and I'm not even sure my new house even _has_ a kitchen." 

Jane grinned. "I had a really good time tonight. I'm glad you invited me along."

"I'm glad too. Your company was refreshing. It's a lot of fun shopping with you. It's been a long time since I've had someone standing next to me saying 'maybe you don't need to spend $2,000 on a pair of boots.'"

"Christ! Which ones were _$2,000_?" Jane demanded in wide-eyed astonishment.

Miranda smiled, "you're like... my link to reality." 

"More like the devil on your shoulder." Jane snorted. 

"More like the angel." Miranda smiled. 

Jane looked away shyly. "I think the coffee is ready." She busied herself with the mugs and turned back to Miranda, holding one of the mugs out to her. 

"Thank you," Miranda sipped it and smiled. "Why don't you come to my house and make this every morning?"

Jane blushed, "well, for one, you never asked me to so I think that's your fault." 

"Fair enough." Miranda said, her voice echoing through the coffee mug as she tipped it back, gulping moutfuls of the hot liquid. 

They enjoyed their coffee in relative silence for a few minutes. Miranda glanced at her watch. "I should probably get going. I have to get up early for a conference call to New York about my retirement benefits. Boring bureaucratic bull, but I'm expected to show up." 

"I hardly think you're one to do something just because it's expected." 

"Well," Miranda grinned, "they probably don't expect me to be on time, they think I don't respect their time -- which I don't, for very legitimate reasons -- so I'm going to throw them off guard by showing up _early_."

"You're devilish." Jane smiled. 

"Should I put my mug in the dishwasher?"

"You can put it in the sink, I'll deal with it." 

"Thanks for the coffee," Miranda held her keys in her hand, "and your company."

"You're welcome," Jane tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. 

"Walk me to my car?" 

The gravel crunched beneath their feet as they approached the silver Lexus. Miranda fiddled with her keys, watching Jane out of the corner of her eye. When she arrived at the car key she stuck it in the lock and opened the door. The dome light illuminated the two women as they stood in the driveway. Miranda looked up at Jane. "Have a good night." 

"You too." Jane shoved her hands into her pockets self-consciously. Miranda started to get into her car when Jane caught her attention. "Miranda?"

"Yes?"

"One more thing." Jane slipped a hand into Miranda's soft silver hair and drew her closer, their lips touched for the first time and Miranda sighed contentedly, her hand coming up to cup Jane's cheek. After a few moments they broke apart, each grinning from ear to ear. "I really like you a lot." 

"I've been waiting for you to do that all day. I was starting to think you were going to let me leave." Miranda chuckled.

"You knew I wanted to kiss you?"

"Give me a little credit, Jane, you sent out all the signals. Whether it's a man or a woman I know when someone's interested in me." 

Jane gave Miranda a playful swat in the arm, "and you let me suffer all day?" 

"I figured it was something you wanted to do yourself. You know fortune favors the bold." Miranda leaned in and stole another kiss. 

"That's why fortune favors you so much." Jane whispered, kissing Miranda again. 

" _And you._ " Miranda kissed Jane. "Our regular lunch tomorrow?"

Jane nodded, "I don't know how long your call is going to go but would you like to just meet me at the restaurant in the Regent?"

Miranda smiled, "sure, see you then."

**

"Why do we always have meetings here?" Harley asked, leaning back in his chair. "There are other restaurants." 

Lauren put a hand on his leg and brought him back to the floor. "Feet on the floor, please, I value your head too much to see it smashed on the ground." 

"That image makes me hungry..." Harley frowned sarcastically. 

"As to your original question: I don't know. I like it, mom likes it and it's conveniently located in downtown."

"You should do their commercials." 

Lauren laughed, "shut-up, smart ass... I'm a little nervous." 

Harley smiled. "This lunch is going to go fine. This firm called _you_ and they're taking you out to lunch and they even said that I was invited. They want you to work for them. Don't be nervous."

"Shit, there he is," Lauren stood up and waved over the representative from the law firm she was hoping would accept her. 

"Excellent restaurant choice." He said as he shook Lauren's hand. "I bring all my out of town clients here. It's great to finally meet you, Lauren."

"And you, too, Mr. Brunswick." 

"Please, call me Steven." 

"This is my husband, Harley." 

Steven shook his hand, "it's nice to meet you, Harley. Are you also a lawyer?"

"No, sir, I'm in computer programming." 

"Good skill to have. I can turn my computer on, write a document and send an e-mail and that's pretty much it. Good skill to have. Have you ordered yet?"

"No , we were waiting for you, we just got here." 

Harley looked up at that moment. "Hey, it's-" he went pale. Jane walked up to the front desk of the hotel with dark glasses on. "Oh no."

"Sweetie, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just... I need some water." He said as he took a big swig of water. He just prayed she wasn't meeting Jake again after the shitstorm that had transpired last time. 

Jane fidgeted with the room keycard she'd just paid for. She hoped that Miranda wouldn't think she was being too forward but she had decided to take the bull by the horns and be bold. She felt like she should make up for the amount of time she spent floundering the day before. Her heart was pounding in her chest. 

Miranda walked in and smiled. "Hope you weren't waiting long." 

"Not at all. I just got here. I was thinking we might try something a little different today..."

"Oh?"

Jane held up the keycard. "How about room service?" 

Miranda grinned. "I think that sounds wonderful." 

Jane took Miranda's hand as she led them to the elevators. Harley's eyes widened. As the doors were sliding shut Jane could no longer resist kissing Miranda. Harley yelped. 

"Harley?" Lauren snapped, half concerned and half annoyed. 

"I'm sorry. I just... I got a pain in my chest. Would you excuse me for just one second?" 

**

"I... I just thought that maybe a little privacy would be good for us today, not that I think anything will happen, per se. I just thought... we would want to be alone." 

"Don't be so nervous." Miranda smiled, finding Jane's nervousness to be endearing. She picked up the phone, "I'll order us lunch if you'd like to compose yourself." Miranda teased. 

Jane smirked, "Caesar salad?"

"You've got it." Miranda dialed down. 

Jane stepped into the bathroom for a moment. When she looked up and caught sight of herself in the mirror she found herself smiling. Despite trying to look serious she found that she couldn't stop smiling. When she stepped back out into the room Miranda had taken off her jacket and taken a seat on the couch. 

Jane walked up to her. "Room for one more?" She asked coyly. 

"Please." Miranda motioned to the empty seat next to her. Jane sat down. 

"How did your call go?"

Miranda sighed, "fine. It was as boring as I anticipated. I was, luckily, on my blutooth so I wasn't tethered to the spot. I spent the conversation putting away my purchases from last night." Miranda ran a hand along Jane's arm. "I'm glad you worked up your courage."

"Me too. So you weren't just kissing me back to be polite?"

"Jane, I'm never polite. What I do and say, I mean." Miranda punctuated her point by capturing Jane's lips. Jane leaned into Miranda, wrapping an arm around her svelte form. Miranda's hand massaged Jane's hip as the kiss deepened. Jane moaned softly, causing Miranda to moan in response and pull Jane closer. Jane pulled her legs up under her to move closer to Miranda. 

There was a knock on the door. Jane yelped and clung to Miranda, "who knows we're here?" 

"It's room service. Are you always this jumpy?" Miranda teased. 

"You should have seen me on prom night. Not that I had sex that night -- not that we're going to have sex today -- not that we're _not_ going to have sex today -- would you put me out of my misery and just get the door?"

Miranda laughed, "try not to hyperventilate in the meantime." Miranda opened the door and accepted the food. "Going to come join me?" 

"Yes..." 

Miranda set out the food on the little table in the corner and Jane took a seat across from her. Jane laid her napkin in her lap and took a few bites of salad, chewing pensively. "Have you ever been in a relationship with a woman?" 

Miranda considered this question for a moment. "Not really, no." She shook her head, "definitely not a sexual one. There was a young woman in my employ who I became quite smitten with a couple of years ago. I don't know if I realized it at the time, that I was attracted to her, but in hindsight I know I was." 

Jane nodded, "did she have feelings for you?"

"She may have. She was fiercely loyal for a while, foresaking all others accommodate me. Though I daresay I made it difficult for anyone to have any feelings for me other than contempt at the time. I was feeling particularly self-loathsome around that time because it was during the end of my marriage to Stephen." 

Jane nodded knowingly. "Divorce is never easy." 

"Sometimes it feels like love is the only thing I've ever failed at." 

"Failing is never easy. We're taught so early on that there is no failing, there are no second chances and as women sometimes it feels like any personal failings are a reflection on the whole gender." 

Miranda smiled, "how about you? Have you ever had a relationship with a woman?"

"Me? No. Never even considered it until I met you." 

"What did I change?"

"You mean apart from everything?" Jane chuckled. "I mean, I'm just blown away by you. By everything about you. You're sexy and smart and well-spoken and thoughtful and sexy."

"You said sexy twice." Miranda pointed out.

"Well, I think it bears repeating." Jane admitted shyly. "I just... I just think you're magnificent." 

"I think you're magnificent too. What first drew me to you was your mystery. I wondered why you were working the front counter of the bakery when you looked so much more sophisticated and I wondered where your name tag was and I loved our game of ingredient guessing and I loved that you treated me like a person and not something to be afraid of. Then I was drawn to your sweetness and your openness. Your smile is so radiant and your laugh is melodic. All of those trite things that people think and say when they're smitten." 

Jane blushed. "Isn't it wonderful when an attraction is mutual? I feel so happy and I can't even imagine how I would have felt if you hadn't kissed me back. I could have lost a dear friend." 

Miranda took her hand, "you certainly haven't lost me." 

"I don't feel that hungry. Maybe we could lay down on the bed and...?" 

Miranda grinned, "I think I can swing it." 

The two women sank into the plush bedding. Jane ran her hands shakily over Miranda's side. "Did you ever do any modeling?"

"I had quite a few professional portraits done over the years. Does that count?" 

"How old were you when your hair went white?" Jane asked as she ran her fingers through the aforementioned locks.

"Thirty."

"Bullshit." Jane laughed. 

"Okay, okay. I was twenty eight and a half but I think it's okay to round up. That was when it started going grey and since it was inevitable I just white-washed it instead trying to dye it blonde." 

"You were blonde?" Jane gently touched Miranda's eyebrows. "Your eyebrows are awfully dark for blond." 

"So are yours." Miranda teased. "I used to dye my hair blonde, I am a natural brunette. You caught me." 

"I used to have dirty blonde hair but now because of the strands of grey it looks lighter." 

Miranda inspected Jane's hair more closely. "Oh yeah. Your hair is like an impressionist painting. The closer you are you can see that all the strands combine to make the color you see from far away." 

"I think I like being compared to a painting." 

"You're prettier and more valuable than a Monet." Miranda whispered, her hand seeking out Jane's hip and outer thigh. 

Jane sighed with contentment and scooted closer, pressing their hips together. Miranda pulled in a shaky breath and brought her lips down onto Jane's. Jane moved her hips against Miranda's, drawing out a low moan as the kiss deepened. Jane's body was aflame from the mms and ahhs coming from Miranda, every little sound she made settled right between Jane's legs. Miranda's hand gripped Jane's ass, pulling her closer. She parted her legs and pulled Jane's between them. Jane moaned as she pressed into Miranda's center with her thigh. Miranda's breath hitched in her throat and came out as a deep moan. 

"Do you want to slow down?" Miranda whispered, panting.

Jane shook her head, "do you?"

"Uh-uh." Miranda pulled Jane back in for a crushing kiss as he hand snaked up Jane's sweater. Jane thrust her chest out and Miranda deftly unhooked Jane's bra. Jane groaned as they had to separate to pull off the sweater and the bra. Miranda's mouth came down on Jane's sensitive nipple. Jane grabbed a fistful of hair and moaned loudly. Miranda was spurred on by the strong reaction and repeated the action with the other nipple until Jane was writhing and moaning. 

When Miranda's hand began to venture lower Jane called out, "wait, wait, wait." 

Miranda looked up confused. 

Jane smiled reassuringly. "I just want to see you. I want to see your beautiful body..." 

Miranda considered this for a moment and stood up. She unzipped her pants and shimmied out of them and pulled off her blouse and stood before Jane in her La Perla underwear. Jane grinned, "Miranda, I love your pubic hair!" 

Miranda blushed deeply. "Well, it's not exactly as if I expected to be naked in front of anyone today." She reached down and attempted to cover where her pubic hair snuck out around her panties. 

"No, no, I'm serious. I was nervous because I don't get bikini waxes anymore and... I love it, it's just naturally you. That's beautiful." 

Miranda snorted. "Let's see yours then," Miranda whispered getting closer to the bed. 

"I'm not in as good a shape as you are... just keep that in mind, okay? I do run but I'm a little heavier. Also older." 

"I doubt that." Miranda admitted climbing over Jane.

"How old are you? I'm 59." Jane said defiantly. 

"61, thank you very much." Miranda grinned triumphantly, starting in on Jane's pants. "The biographer who rewrote my past rewrote my age too." 

"I would never -- ever in a million years -- guess you were over sixty." 

"Stop trying to distract me." Miranda scolded playfully as she tugged down Jane's jeans. Miranda ran her hands appreciatively over Jane's toned leg muscles, "I love runners' legs." Miranda whispered as she gently dragged her teeth along a hard calf. "Even sexier than dancers' legs." 

Jane blushed and mmmed as Miranda lavished attention to her legs. Jane couldn't remember the last time someone had shown such interest in the non-sexual parts of her body. Jane wondered why she'd never considered women before. Jane snapped out of her ponderances when Miranda's fingers slipped under the waistband of her underwear. 

Jane lifted her hips instinctively to aid Miranda in their removal. Miranda pulled them down and discarded them haphazardly. She settled between Jane's legs and nuzzled the crevice where her thigh met her pelvis. Jane's eyes slipped shut and she ran her fingers through Miranda's hair. Miranda smiled against the sensitive skin, sending a shiver through Jane's body. Miranda used her fingers to gently part Jane's outer lips and extended her tongue to rub Jane's clit. 

Jane cried out her appreciation which spurred Miranda on. Miranda's tongue made tight circles around Jane's clit as her hand kneaded her thigh. 

"Yes... yes..." the words escaped Jane's lips of their own accord as Jane felt the rest of her shut off so that all the available resources could rush to her center. 

Whether Miranda had done this before or she hadn't she was amazing at it. She felt the familiar sensation that Miranda knew her whole body, that she'd memorized it from head to toe and the thought sent an extra jolt of arousal through her body which unexpectedly caused her orgasm to tear through her. 

Miranda looked up in wonder. Jane vainly tugged the sheet over her naked body while Miranda wiped her mouth off. 

Jane just groaned and rolled over onto her stomach as her body reeled. Miranda laid down next to the still pulsing body of her lover and nuzzled her neck. Jane looked up into Miranda's face and kissed her. Jane's arms wrapped around Miranda and held her tightly as they kissed. 

Jane was in a haze of arousal and she wanted to make sure Miranda knew just exactly how appreciated her efforts were. Her hand slid into Miranda's panties and moaned when she found how wet she was. 

Miranda bit her lip and moaned, parting her legs for Jane's convenience. Jane pushed them back together in order to pull the silk panties away from her intended target and nudged them apart with her body as she settled between the warm thighs. 

Miranda arched her back and hooked a leg around Jane. Jane paused, trying to decide how many fingers she ought to use. Miranda's groan brought Jane back to the moment and she decided to start with two and add as needed. 

The first time Jane's fingers slid into Miranda she thought she would orgasm again just from the feeling of Miranda's muscles reacting and contracting around the digits. Jane added a third finger and started to move in and out of Miranda, curling upward to press against the sensitive tissue. 

Miranda moaned and groaned and writhed. Jane watched her chest heave and her thighs tremble and as she was beginning to fear that she wouldn't be able to maintain the control of her thrusts for much longer Miranda's muscles started to clench tightly down onto Jane's fingers. 

Jane groaned both in pain and pleasure as Miranda's walls clamped around her and contracted. Miranda let out an animalistic guttural moan from deep within her throat. 

Jane moved up the bed to lay next to Miranda. Miranda panted and wiped at her sweaty forehead. She looked over at Jane and grinned. "That was pretty perfect..." 

"My sentiments exactly." Jane threaded her fingers through Miranda's and pulled her into a slower, sensual kiss. Miranda's stomach growled and they both laughed, "I think you worked up an appetite." 

"It would seem so."


	2. Chapter 2

The women ate their lunch leisurely and then took a shower. Miranda dabbed on a few spots of perfume from a bottle she kept in her purse and they both reapplied their make-up. 

Miranda smacked her lips together in the mirror and then grinned. "I'm glad we did this."

"So am I." Jane confirmed with a shy grin. "And I can't wait to do it again." 

They slung their purses over their shoulders and left the room. As they were approaching the elevators Miranda's phone rang. She picked it up, "hello Bobbsey." 

"Hey mum, there's this thing at school tonight, like a department ceremony and all the honors students are going to get awards. Do you want to come?" 

"Of course, Cass, I'd love to. What time?" 

Cassidy filled her in on the details and then added, "you should bring Jane." 

Miranda was momentarily stunned by the suggestion but managed to stutter out, "yes, I'll ask her. I love you, Bob, I'll see you and Caroline at six." Miranda hung up and slipped the phone in her purse. "Would you like to go to an awards banquet at UCLA with me? Cassidy asked me to bring you." 

"Really?" 

Miranda nodded. 

"Well, I'd hate to disappoint." Jane shrugged but her smiling belied the fact that she was thrilled to have won the favor of the Priestly twins so easily. 

"You don't disappoint." Miranda pulled Jane into an embrace and kissed her deeply. Jane made circles on Miranda's back as they kissed. 

Jane pulled back with heavily lidded eyes. "Careful or I'm not going to let you leave." 

The elevator dinged and opened. They got in and pressed lobby. "I'm meeting the girls at 6. It's one now. I could pick you up around 5:30?" 

Jane nodded, "perfect." 

As the elevator doors slid open they were still kissing. The sudden rush of outside air alerted them that they were in the lobby. They exited hand in hand. 

"Hey boss." Harley waved half-heartedly from a chair in the lobby. 

Jane jumped and laid her free hand over her heart. "Harley! What are you doing here? And honestly, what are the odds?" 

He laughed nervously as he stood up, "yeah, it's pretty whacky, right? Two midday trysts, same hotel, I am a witness to both..." 

"What are you doing here?" Jane repeated more forcefully. 

"I was here for a lunch with Lauren and a lawyer at the firm she wants to get hired at when I saw you... I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Just because the last time Jake had that heart thing, you know? I just wanted to stick around and make sure -- hi, I'm Harley." His babbling gave way to an introduction. 

Miranda blinked at him for a moment, surprised at suddenly being addressed. She shook his hand. "Hello." 

"Does Lauren know?" 

He shook his head. "She didn't see you and..." 

"And you didn't tell her?" 

"Not my place... is it a secret?" Harley's eyes glinted in childlike curiousity. 

"Why don't you run along and I'll call you if we need you?"

He chuckled nervously, "you got it, boss." He shoved his hands in his pockets, "and it was lovely to meet you..." 

"Miranda," she said with a sigh when she realized he was incessantly fishing for her name. 

Once Harley had fled the lobby Jane gave Miranda's hand a squeeze. "That's a good question. Is it a secret?" 

"If it is we probably shouldn't have made out in the hallway." Miranda teased. 

"Yeah, or here in the lobby." Jane ran her fingers through Miranda's hair and pressed her lips sweetly to Miranda's. 

"I don't consider it a secret but ordinarily I make it a rule only to introduce the girls to people that I'm dating when it's serious but obviously they've met you already." 

Jane ran her thumb over the back of Miranda's hand. "Trust me, I understand the strong desire to make sure your kids feel stability. All of my kids are out of college and I still feel protective of them, especially because the divorce was hard on all of them. We don't have to tell our children if we want to just feel us out for a while." 

"I think that sounds good." Miranda smiled. "So, do you still want to come to the banquet?" 

"Of course I do, I was invited." 

Miranda grinned, "so you were." 

**

"Girls," Miranda scolded, laying a hand over the screen of Caroline's cell phone, "don't text during a speech." 

"He's just saying boring stuff." Cassidy rolled her eyes. 

"Be that as it may, it's very rude." 

Caroline looked up from her cell phone, "you walk out of boring speeches all the time. Since when do you care about rudeness?"

"Since do as I say not as I do." Miranda said pointedly and pulled the phone from Caroline's hand and set it face down on the table. Caroline huffed. 

Miranda's cell phone vibrated. She rolled her eyes and saw a text from Nigel reading: _urgent call when u get this_. "Excuse me," she stood up from the table. "I'll just be a moment." She gave Jane's shoulder a squeeze as she stepped out of the room. 

"So," Cassidy said, setting down her phone and turning to Jane. "How are things?" 

"Things are good." Jane nodded, "how about your things?" 

Cassidy shrugged, "would be better if we weren't sitting through this boring ass ceremony." 

"It's not mandatory, is it?" 

"We wanted to see you again. We thought it would be a good cover." Caroline explained. 

"Cover for... what?" 

"We just wanted to say that we know our mother can be kind of a control freak. She doesn't mean anything personal by it, you know, she just used to running the world so she's on a 24-7 ego trip." 

"And we just hope that you can take it in stride because she's really a great person after you get past the rude, pretentious outer casing. She just seems so happy with you and we really love seeing her happy." 

"She told you?" Jane's mouth was open in surprise, considering the discussion they'd had earlier. 

"Oh please, we've sat through enough dinners with potential stepparents to know when one is auditioning for the role." Caroline smirked. 

"But even if she tells you about how we used to treat potential stepparents we've matured so much since then." 

"Also, we think you're pretty cool. We approve of you. We think you're good for her." 

Jane nodded slowly, surprised by the whole conversaiton and unprepared for the way the twins finished each other's sentences. Her mind began to wonder what horrors they had inflicted upon unsuspecting potential stepfathers in the past. 

As if reading her thoughts Cassidy added, "we were only bitches about it because they just saw us as baggage but you treat us like people." 

"You _are_ people." Jane laughed uncomfortably. 

Miranda returned to the room moments later, "sorry about that." 

**

"You know girls..." Miranda started, "when you invited me to this banquet I was under the impression that you would be receiving awards. So why did you really lure Jane and I here?" 

"Just wanted to see you." Cassidy shrugged. 

Miranda decided not to push but she found the circumstances suspicious. "Next time you want to see me let's do dinner at the house like usual. Okay?"

Caroline nodded, "yeah...." 

Miranda kissed each girl and started across campus with Jane in search of the car. "One thing I can't understand," Miranda said after they'd been walking for a few minutes, "is why university campuses all over the country can't _pull it together_ and actually have conveniently located parking lots. I don't want a ten minute walk to my car, what if it was cold?"

"It _is_ cold!" Jane laughed. 

"Oh honey, you don't know cold, I'll bring you back to New York with me this winter and we can play in the snow." 

Jane breathed on her hands as they walked, "I remember the first time I saw snow. It was when I was in Paris. I'd just completed my final for the semester and I stepped out onto the street and it was raining down on me like confetti." 

Miranda snorted a laugh. Jane took Miranda's hand and huddled close. "Are we almost to the car? I think I'm succumbing to hypothermia." 

"I think we're almost there..." Miranda admitted slowly, looking around the parking lot. 

"Maybe we should have had the girls escort us back..."

"We're not lost in a parking lot." Miranda said firmly, trying to convince both of them. Miranda dug her keys out of her wallet and clicked the lock button to see if she was close enough to make contact with the Lexus. After a few minutes of wandering and clicking it finally announced its location. 

Jane let out an audible sigh of relief. Miranda pressed the unlock button and Jane hustled to get in and wrap her arms around herself. Miranda got in and turned on the heat. 

"I can't believe it's only 7:45." Jane exclaimed. "It feels like we were adrift in this parking lot for a lot longer than fifteen minutes." 

Miranda smiled indulgently. "I think there's a blanket in the backseat if you're that cold." 

Jane reached behind her and pulled the emergency blanket out from under her seat. "Lovely. Thank you." 

"It's still pretty early. Would you like to come back to my place for a night cap?" 

Jane nodded, eager for a chance to finally see Miranda's house. "I'd love that." The drive was silent for a while before Jane looked over and said to Miranda, "the girls know."

"Know what?"

"Know us. They know we're dating. They figured it out." 

Miranda smiled proudly. "My cunning little demon children. I think they told Nigel to call me so they could get you alone, his crisis was easily solved at best and a complete waste of my time at worst. Did they torture you?" 

Jane shook her head, "no. They wanted to emphasize that they liked me and not to be afraid if you'd told them how they'd treated your suitors in the past. I hesitate to ask..." 

"They were rotten for the longest time. Partially because they were still mad about my divorce from their father and partially because they were so smart that they didn't know what else to do with themselves. I cannot even list all the pranks and practical jokes they pulled on suitors and my assisstants alike. They knew better than to play any on me which is probably what kept it going for so long, they wanted to punish me indirectly." 

Jane nodded, "Jake was always the fun, permissive one and when he moved out my kids all hated me for months -- maybe years -- maybe they got good at hiding it. It's hard when your marriage dissolves and your children blame you for it." 

Miranda agreed. "But we have wonderful relationships with our children now and I've even been able to have some pleasant sit down dinners with Lucas when we were discussing the girls' college." 

"Where they'd go?"

"Which one of us would get to pay for it. We finally just decided to split the girls. I pay for Cassidy's and Lucas pays for Caroline's. It's the same expenses because they live together and go to the same school. For a while we made an embarrassingly big show about throwing money around at the girls, attempting to win favor." 

"You know, I can imagine that. You're not big on losing." 

"Is anyone?" Miranda chuckled. 

Miranda pulled into the carport and cut the engine. She led them inside. Jane looked around the masterful entryway. It was immaculately clean and the marble floors seemed to sparkle in the light. Jane would have expected no less from the pristine, controlled woman in front of her. The house was Spanish style as were all of the houses in the area but Jane would be loath to refer to it as anything other than a mansion. 

She quickly scolded herself for the hyperbole but had a hard time convincing herself it ought to be referred to merely as a house. 

They walked down the hall and Jane took note of all the pictures of Runway covers which gave way to pictures of Miranda with various recognizable and unrecognizable celebrities which finally gave way to pictures of Miranda with her girls before spilling out into an even grander entryway. Two staircases curled up to the second floor and a chandelier hung from the tall ceiling, Jane gazed up in wonder. 

"I know." Miranda said with a mollifying smile. "It's too big but it was the only house that fit all of my specifications that I was unwilling to compromise on." 

"Which were?" Jane smiled. 

"Marble floors," Miranda tugged off her scarf and stepped closer to Jane, "a room for Caroline and a room for Cassidy as well as two supplementary guest bedrooms, a home office, a pool and one other thing." 

"What's that?" Jane asked, playfully pulling on Miranda's coat. 

"Allow me to show you." Miranda extended a hand for the blonde. Jane took it and Miranda led them up one of the staircases and down the hallway. When they entered the master bedroom Jane's eyes were immediately drawn to the plush California King with the rich brown canopy and the matching cherry bureau and armoire. Miranda pulled her toward a pair of double doors and opened them to reveal a balcony that was fenced in by wrought iron. 

Jane looked out over the landscape her mouth fell open in awe. 

Miranda wrapped her arms around Jane and rested her chin on Jane's shoulder. "A view of the ocean." 

"How many bedrooms?" 

"Five and the master." 

"Two for your children, three for mine. That seals it, I'm moving in." Jane joked, turning around in Miranda's arms. "Would you like to give me a tour of the rest of the house? I feel like I could wander off trying to find the bathroom and be lost for days." 

"Don't be silly. The master has an en suite bathroom. You couldn't get lost if you tried." 

"Don't underestimate my ability to get lost." Jane laughed, running her hands up Miranda's back. 

"How about I give you the grand tour in the morning?" 

"Are you inviting me to stay the night?" Jane whispered coyly. 

"Well, it would be awfully wasteful for you to have to go home and then come back. Much more environmentally friendly for you to just stay over." Miranda whispered as she gently kissed Jane's neck. 

"When you put it that way..." Jane's eyes slipped shut and she found herself completely willing to do anything Miranda asked. 

**

Harley and Lauren were lounging on the bed while Grey's Anatomy played in the background. Harley did not consider him a fan of the medical drama but had managed to retain almost all of the important details since Lauren had started watching. 

"So," Harley said, breaking Lauren's concentration. "What do you think of Callie's bisexuality?" 

Lauren shrugged, "she was never my favorite character, but it's fine. It adds drama to the show." 

"Out of the context of a show. How do you feel about bisexuality in practice?" 

Lauren laughed, "Harley, are you trying to come out to me?"

"Me? No, no. I was just curious." Harley tried his best to look nonchalant. 

"I have no problem bisexuality, homosexuality, heterosexuality or asexuality. It takes all kinds, right? And regardless of whether you are or aren't trying to tell me you're bisexual it wouldn't matter to me either way because I love you." She turned back to Grey's Anatomy for a moment before turning to Harley again, "unless you're asking for my permission to have sex with other people. I'm definitely not cool with that."

"I'm not bisexual." Harley insisted. "Once in middle school in the locker room I looked over at one of the other boys and it did nothing for me." 

"Why the questions all of a sudden?" Lauren furrowed her brow. 

"Someone I know... well, I found out that this person was a switch hitter and to be honest... it's a little unnerving. I've known this person for years and I never had a clue." 

"Someone you work with?" Lauren asked. 

"The boss." He said, hoping that the double meaning would prevent him from lying but not give Jane's secret away. 

"I'm kind of surprised at you, Harley."

"Me? Why?" He was stunned. 

"I thought you were more open than that. Don't treat your boss any differently. It's as trivial as finding out what kind of toothpaste he uses."

"No. I mean. Yes, I agree it's trivial in the grand scheme of things. I just brought it up because I wanted to know what your opinion of it was. That's all." He attempted to deflect her annoyance. 

"I hope you haven't already made an ass of yourself." 

"Yeah, no. Don't worry. I probably have..." 

**

In the morning Jane awoke promptly at 5 like any other morning. She turned over to look at Miranda's sleeping form. Miranda's eyes flitted under her eyelids occasionally and her lips were parted slightly, every other breath came with a slight whistle through her deviated septum. Jane smiled at the beautiful naked woman beside her in bed. Jane gently ran her fingers through Miranda's hair. "Do you mind if I make coffee?" She whispered.

"Time is it?" Miranda murmured sleepily. 

"It's five. You don't have to get up." 

"Wasn't going to." She grinned groggily. "Give me half an hour? And of course you can make coffee." 

"Thanks," Jane leaned down and kissed Miranda softly. 

"Why do you think I had you over?" Miranda teased even as she was falling back asleep. 

Jane pulled on her underwear and her sweater and left the room. She quickly realized that she didn't know where the kitchen was. She figured it would have to be on the first floor so she found her way back to the staircase and descended. After poking her head into several distinctly not kitchen rooms she finally found it at the opposite end of the hall from the carport. 

Jane opened the coffee maker and found a new filter already waiting. She looked around the counter for coffee canisters and then in the refrigerator and finally in the cabinet. 

"Are you trying to make coffee?" A voice came from behind Jane. Jane let out a soft yelp of surprise and whipped around. A petite hispanic woman stood by the pantry cupboard holding a canister of coffee. "I... I'm sorry, I did not mean to frighten you." The woman apologized, looking frightened. 

"No, no, it's fine... the coffee's in the pantry cupboard?"

"Si. She keeps spares in there, too. She really likes her coffee." 

Jane felt beyond self conscious standing there in her underwear in front of a startled woman. "Thanks. That's all I was looking for. I'll... I'll be back." She stuttered before making haste down the hallway. She didn't slow down until she was back in the master bedroom and launched herself back under the covers. 

"I don't think it's been a half hour..." Miranda mumbled playfully. 

"You didn't tell me you have a maid service." 

"Is it Wednesday?"

"Yes." 

"I take it you met Anita." Miranda laughed, "were you naked?"

"No. Thank god." 

"You're lucky it wasn't Friday." 

"Why, what's Friday?" Jane asked nervously. 

"It's just when the grocery boy brings the groceries. He's a big guy, very muscular, I think he plays football."

"You don't buy your own groceries?" Jane was surprised. 

"Why should I? I provide employment. I'm doing my part for the economy." Miranda pushed herself into a sitting position, pretty sure she wasn't getting back to sleep anytime soon.

"Yeah, but it's just so..." 

"Arrogant?" Miranda offered. 

Jane snorted, "it's just so upper class." 

"I did tell you how much money I have?" 

"Not an exact figure." 

"I could call my accountant and get an exact figure if you'd like." 

Jane shrugged, "of course I don't need an exact figure. It's not even really any of my business. It's not like I'm hurting for money either. I'm just... I guess I considered myself fairly wealthy and I'm just shocked by your affluence." 

"Is it going to be a problem?"

"No..."

Miranda wrapped the sheet around her. "You hesitated." 

"I just have to get used to it, I suppose." 

"You run a business. You employ people to keep the kitchen stocked and do the cleaning, don't you?" Miranda waited and Jane nodded, "think of me as a business. I am. I do work and I make a profit. Since I work from home this is my office and I pay people to help my business run smoothly." 

Jane nodded, "that's a very astute comparison that makes it difficult for me to disagree with your logic." 

Miranda smiled and Jane smiled back. "Why don't we get dressed and have a cup of coffee?" 

**

After spending the morning together they decided to skip their usual lunch and plan a dinner at Jane's house. Jane was bustling about preparing the meal, she was making a prime rib with asparagus in hollandaise, mashed sweet potatoes and dark chocolate truffles for dessert. As soon as all the food was cooking on its own she stole away to the bedroom to change into the outfit Miranda had given to her. Miranda was twenty minutes earlier which Jane had come to expect. 

Jane let Miranda into the house and Miranda was quick to admire Jane in the clothes. "I never cease to amaze myself." Miranda said playfully, "you look amazing. Of course, you're always beautiful but do you see what I was saying about the right cut for your body type?" 

"I do." Jane kissed Miranda, "I'm considering letting you dress me from here on out." 

"Dinner smells like heaven." 

**

"Open up." Jane demanded playfully as she straddled Miranda's hips. 

Miranda accepted the chocolate morsel with an appreciative mmm. Miranda laughed, "a couple more of these truffles and my hips are going to be too wide for you to straddle." Her manicured fingernails trailing down Jane's arm. 

"You came to California you were a size two, maybe you're a four now." Jane teased. 

Miranda feigned shock. "A size four? Christ in heaven. Four is the new six, you know." 

"Yeah, yeah. So you say." Jane started unbuttoning Miranda's blouse, "but if size is all that important, how, pray tell, did a size eight end up in bed with a size two?"

"Easy and it's still a matter of size." The palms of Miranda's hands cupped Jane's breasts. "The more important question is how did a B end up in bed with a pair of luscious Ds?" 

"Oh, I see your argument. You're saying it all evens out in the end?" Jane asked, moaning intermittently as Miranda kneaded her breasts. "I daresay if you came up to my size in waist your breasts would follow suit."

"Neither I nor the rest of my body have ever been joiners." 

Jane laughed, "you're too funny." 

"I didn't realize there was a limit on how funny I was allowed to be. Here I thought I was being reservedly funny." Jane laughed harder. Miranda's hands kneaded Jane's ass as it moved above her lap. Miranda's lips descended on Jane's ear, "I want to fuck you." She whispered. 

Jane moaned, her fit of laughter all but forgotten as Miranda's words caused her whole body to ache with anticipation. "God Miranda," she buried her face in Miranda's neck. 

Miranda's left hand continued to carress Jane's ass as her right hand started on Jane's zipper.

"Mom?" Lauren and Gabby gawked from the doorway. Harley hung back pretending he didn't already know. 

Jane jumped up, pulling her zipper back up, Miranda pulled her shirt closed and crossed her legs. 

Lauren ventured further into the room. "Mom, how did you end up... with Miranda Priestly?" 

"It's..." Jane wrung her hands, "it's, well, it's complicated." 

Miranda smirked, "it's not _that_ complicated." Miranda buttoned her blouse back up. "Should I go?" 

"No, Miranda, you stay." Jane took a deep breath. "Why don't we all go out and discuss this in the living room?" Jane grabbed Harley's t-shirt and pulled him back, "Harley..."

"I didn't breathe a word, boss, I swear. Lauren and Gabby bought The Hills on DVD and they thought you were lonely so they wanted to come over and watch it with you and I tried to talk them out of it but they thought I just didn't want to watch The Hills -- which I don't." 

"Nor do I." Miranda chimed in. 

"Oh thank God." Harley exclaimed. 

"Harley. Living room." Jane said dismissively. 

"I didn't breathe a word, either, boss, spare my life?" Miranda joked. 

Jane shook her head and laughed, "come on. Let's go out to the living room." Jane took Miranda's hand and walked down the hall. The girls looked up at them from couch. "First of all, how did you know she's Miranda Priestly?" Jane couldn't help but let the curiosity get the better of her. 

"Uh, mom, hello, she only runs the biggest fashion magazine in the country." Gabby gawked. "How are you sleeping with her and you don't know that?" 

Lauren elbowed Gabby, "mom and fashion? Come on." 

"This is getting off topic." Jane sighed. "Yes, I'm sleeping with Miranda Priestly. Well, _dating_. It's only been going on for a couple of days and before that I'd known her for about a month. I was going to tell you soon. We were just waiting to get to know each other a little better first. Any questions?" 

"Yeah. Are you wearing Versace?" Gabby raised her eyebrows. 

"Uh... yes?" 

Miranda nodded, "the skirt is Versace, the blouse is Prada and the shoes are Manolos." 

"Oh my god, could you hook me up?" Gabby's eyes were wide with excitement. 

"Sure." Miranda nodded. 

"What Miranda means," Jane said pointedly. "Is maybe for Christmas." 

Gabby pouted. 

"Any other questions?" 

"How did you meet?" Lauren asked.

"She came to the bakery." 

Lauren and Gabby nodded. "Dad's going to hate that you're dating again."

"It's none of your father's business." Jane shrugged, "any last questions?"

"Is there any food left? I didn't have lunch." 

"In the refrigerator, help yourselves." Jane motioned in the direction of the kitchen and her children and children-in-law made a bee line for the food. "That was easier than I expected." 

"Things are different than when we were young." Miranda rubbed Jane's arm, "easy is a good thing." 

**

"Adam Sanders, please?" Jake asked the associate who wondered past him. She pointed him towards Adam's office. "Hi. Remember me?"

"Unfortunately." Adam nodded. "What do you want?"

"Did you know Jane's dating again?"

Adam looked up, suddenly interested in the conversation. "Go on." 

Jake sat on the side of Adam's desk, despite the look of annoyance he received because of it. "Some guy named Mirando Priestly. Heard of him?" 

"Mirando? No. But a woman named Miranda Priestly bought the big Spanish Colonial house on Continental a couple of months ago." 

"Do you memorize real estate listings?" Jake rolled his eyes, unable to believe his ex-wife ever had an interest in this boring man. 

"No." Adam sneered. "It was one of the first houses that I designed an addition for and I was curious who bought it. No law against that." 

"A woman named Miranda, huh?" Jake pondered this. "Think she's any relation to Mirando? Maybe a twin sister?" 

"Maybe it _is_ Miranda and she's dating a woman."

"Janie? I doubt that very much." Jake rolled his eyes. "I was married to for her too many years not know that she is all hetero." 

"Maybe being married to you turned her." Adam smirked. 

"Maybe dating you turned her, pipsqueak." Jake smacked him in the shoulder. "Google Mirando." 

"The only reason I'm going to do this is to prove to you that there is no such person as Mirando." Adam opened his laptop and typed. "No results for Mirando Priestly, showing results for Miranda Priestly. First picture in the image search is a white haired woman standing with George Clooney." 

"Is she an actress I've never heard of?" Jake squinted at the photo. 

Adam clicked the wikipedia link. "She's a fashion editor from New York." 

"Fashion. That seals it. She can't have anything to do with Janie." Jake rolled his eyes, "you have to ask her who she's dating."

"No! You ask the kids." 

"They'll go right to Janie and tell her that I'm interested and she'll read me the riot act." 

"She's not going to tell me! Besides she's never at the house while I'm there. Find some other patsy to do your dirty work." 

**

Adam was around the back of the house scribbling notes on the plans when the door to the house opened up and Jane stood there. "Hi... thought I'd come out and see how everything's going..." 

"It's, yeah, it's great." Adam was shocked to see her. "I never see you around anymore. Someone special in your life these days?" 

"Actually... yes, there is." Jane smiled. 

"Tell me about him." Adam was ashamed of himself for playing into Jake's suspicions. 

Jane hesitated for a moment as she studied his face. "Not jealous are we?" 

"No!" Adam shook his head profusely. "No, no. It's just friendly curiosity. I went out with a dental hygienist last week and all through dinner she had a piece of broccoli in her teeth and I... it was so comedically perfect that I couldn't bring myself to tell her." 

Jane laughed, "I don't think I would have been able to make it through a whole dinner." 

"So tell me about your new beau? Who is the dashing gentleman who has won fair lady's heart?" 

"I... I'm happy. I don't want to jinx it by telling everybody." 

"Hey, if you can't tell your architect who you don't know very well, who can you tell?" Adam laughed nervously as Jane continued to watch him with suspicion. 

Jane clapped him on the back. "Okay, Adam, you guys have fun out here. There's coffee and croissants inside for anyone who wants them." 

**

"Hey, I know we don't know each other well or anything but I felt like I couldn't be this close to Miranda Priestly and not get a sit down, you know?" Gabby smiled.

Miranda nodded. She was bound and determined to get along with Jane's children as well as Jane got along with hers. She sipped her coffee. 

"It's hard being the unsuccessful daughter around my mother and Lauren -- and now you, I guess -- they don't take me seriously, though, but I really want to get a good job doing something I love and just get really bitchass great at it, you know? Is it all in the clothes? Because I-" 

"Gabby. Dear.... may I say something?" Miranda put up a hand.

"Yeah, totally." Gabby nodded. 

" _Shut-up_." Miranda slipped. "...that came out wrong but it's sound advice nonetheless. It is not all in the clothes, it is all in the attitude. When it comes to talking less is more." 

Gabby nodded, still stunned. 

"As someone who has interviewed thousands of people over the years I can give you this advice. Anything you want your potential employer to know you write it on the resume. When you meet the interviewer, you shake hands, introduce yourself, hand over the resume and stay quiet. They will ask if they have questions. Over eager is a turn off and never _ever_ utter the words 'I need this job,' don't fidget, if you have a fidgeting problem sit with your legs crossed and your hands folded. When they speak to you be _sure_ of every answer you give -- even if you aren't. When you leave you shake their hand and smile like you know you've gotten the job."

Gabby smiled slowly, "awesome." 

Miranda pulled a small notebook out of her purse and began to write, "also, I am making you a list of words to avoid. Please note that _bitchass_ is at the top." 

Gabby smiled. "Thank you, Miranda."

Miranda smiled up at Gabby. "You're doing better already. So," Miranda set down her coffee. "Shall I take you shopping for an interview outfit?" 

Gabby grinned excitedly. "I'd love that." 

**

Miranda nervously walked up to the front door of Jane's house for the first family dinner she was invited to. She was early. As she was the first one there Jane greeted her with a deep kiss. "Mmm, you taste like you've been dipping into dinner." 

"I have to taste it to make sure I'm not poisoning everyone, don't I?" Jane grinned. 

"If that's what poison tastes like count me in," Miranda whispered as she kissed Jane again.

Luke, Lauren and Harley arrived and Jane decided that waiting for her unpredictable daughter might be foolhardy. Jane sat at the head of the table, Miranda sat to one of her sides which pushed Luke further down the table and would put Gabby at the opposite head when she arrived. 

"Do anything fascinating today, Miranda?" Lauren smiled. "I've read Runway religiously since High School." 

Miranda shrugged, "retirement is pretty uneventful. I'm thinking about flying out to a few of the upcoming photo shoots. My successor has been asking me to help oversee a few things."

"What did you do today, mom?" Luke asked as he took a big bite of green beans. 

"I stopped by the construction to see how everybody was doing." 

"Even Adam?" Luke raised an eyebrow.

"Even Adam." Jane confirmed tersely. "He was acting strange." 

Lauren laughed, "we didn't exactly see him acting normally. You two were pretty stoned at the party." 

Miranda choked on her mashed potatoes and started laughing. "Sorry." She waved a hand in front of her, hoping to push the attention away. 

Jane smirked and took Miranda's hand, giving it a squeeze. 

The front door banged open and an excited Gabby ran into the room. "I got the job!" She squealed. "You're looking at the new weather girl for channel nine news!" 

"Congratulations!" Jane smiled, starting to stand in preparation for hugging Gabby. 

Gabby, instead, wrapped her arms around Miranda, which startled everyone -- most of all Miranda -- "your advice was amazing and the woman complimented me on my outfit. How did I survive life without you before?"

Miranda patted Gabby's arm, "let's not be melodramatic, shall we?"

"Okay. That's another thing I should add to my list?" She dug out a notepad from her pocket, "Luke, mind if I sit next to Miranda? Miranda, can I pour you a glass of wine?"

"No, I'm all set. Thank you." 

"Miranda, can I speak with you for a moment in private?" Jane stood from the table. 

Miranda laid her napkin down on the table, "sure." 

They walked out to the backyard and Miranda turned to Jane to say something but stopped when she saw the frown creasing her normally happy go lucky lover's features. "What did you do to my daughter? She's taking notes from you?"

"She asked me for advice in regards to interviewing. And obviously something I said was right because she got the job. You're always saying that you wished she'd get her act together and do something she really wanted to do."

"You've known me for a month you don't what constitutes always!" Jane snapped. "And what was it she said about her outfit?"

"I..." Miranda looked away guiltily. "I bought her a new outfit for her interview."

"After I told you not to?" Jane demanded.

"You didn't 'tell me not to.' You said to Gabby maybe for Christmas. It was one outfit and it was _for_ a specific interview. I bought you clothes." 

"We're sleeping together!" 

"We weren't at the time!" Miranda scowled. "I was just trying to be nice. I figured I ought to since I'd told her to shut-up."

"You told my daughter to shut up?" Jane gawked. "Your daughters put ticker tape machines to shame with the amount of information they can spew out and you told my daughter to shut up?" 

"I told her to shut up because she was asking for my advice but wouldn't let me speak. I apologized and I gave her the advice she asked for."

"And then bribed her with couture." 

"It wasn't a _bribe_. It was for an _interview_. A _specific_ interview." Miranda snarled, "stop yelling at me." 

" _Shut up_." Jane snapped. 

"Do you want me to go? What do you want from me? You brought the twins a box of eclairs when we went to UCLA. It's the same thing except you deal in food, I deal in clothes. I won't do it again without your written permission, okay?"

Jane frowned, "that's not what I want... I don't want you to go... you don't need my permission to do something nice... we should have talked about it though. We should have had a conversation about whether you could buy them clothes because those are expensive and I want my children to not feel like things will be handed to them. And for once in my damn life, I want to be the fun parent. I don't want to be the buzz kill in every relationship I'm ever in." 

"You're not the buzz kill. I told Gabby to shut up. That's not fun." 

Jane laughed weakly. "That's true..." 

"You can be the fun one with _my_ girls." 

Jane snorted, "you're already the fun one." 

"If you think _I'm_ the fun one ask them about the ponies that Lucas bought them and the property in Albany he bought to keep them on. They were already ten years old and the jerk bought them ponies instead of horses. They were already too heavy for ponies. I talked Lucas into donating them to an equine therapy program. The girls didn't say a _word_ to me for weeks. Believe me, I have always been the buzz kill." 

"I guess buzz kill just means different things in our families, huh?" Jane smiled a little. "I'll figure out a way to spoil the twins."

"Word to the wise they love chocolate croissants." 

Jane grinned, "that's my specialty. Later when we're alone we can talk about giving gifts to each other's children?" 

Miranda nodded, "I think that would be good." Miranda kissed Jane softly.

The two women rejoined the kids at the table. They stared at them in anticipation and dread. "Calm down." Jane scolded a she took her seat. 

Miranda sat down and gave Jane's hand a gentle squeeze. 

"It just... sounded pretty heated." Luke bit his lip. "I mean, are you guys breaking up before I even had a chance to talk to her?"

"No." Jane furrowed her brow, "people can argue without breaking up. It's part of a healthy relationship. You shouldn't be so skittish around arguments." 

"Is it because of me?" Gabby looked to Miranda with worry.

"No, it was because of _me_." 

"Should I give you back the outfit?"

"Of course not, sweetie." Jane shook her head.

"If it's going to be a point of tension between you two maybe she should." Luke said and Gabby nodded in agreement. 

"We worked it out. It's _okay_." Jane insisted. 

**

"Hello dear." Lucas chirped sarcastically as he picked up the phone. 

"I assume you know why I'm calling." Miranda pursed her lips. 

"On the opposite side of the country and you're still giving me shit..." Lucas muttered.

"If you'd like me to come to New York to give you shit it can be arranged." Miranda snapped, "we have a deal. The only times of the year when we are allowed to give large sums of money to each other's twin is on their birthday and on Christmas." 

"Now, which one of us was it that drove the girls to Hollywood and rang up a $5,000 bill buying clothes and dinner for _both_ twins..." 

"Don't do that. Stop using your position at the bank to access my account. It's unethical." Miranda sneered, "and I bought them things for _school_."

"I give Caroline an allowance. You're not supposed to spend money on Caroline." 

"So am I supposed to tell Caroline that she has to stay home when I take Cassidy out? That's ludicrous. I live in the same city as they do and I can't ignore Caroline." 

"Fine, then send me the bill for Caroline and I'll reimburse you." Lucas said coolly. 

Miranda rolled her eyes. "I wish you'd become an adult already. Dealing with a five-year-old was passe when the twins turned six." 

"Oh, I get it. You're telling me I'm a five-year-old. That is _such_ a seven-year-old insult, Miranda." 

There was silence on the other end as Miranda silently counted to three. "By the way, Lucas, I just dumped my NYC Bank & Trust stocks, I think you should do the same." 

"Yeah, right." 

"I wasn't going to tell you but during the course of this conversation I decided you're right and I should act like an adult across the board. So, I'm telling you, the company is going to tank." 

Lucas snorted, "I'm not biting, Miranda. Nice try. Don't forget to keep your receipts when you take the girls out." 

There was a click on the other end and Miranda hung up with an eye roll. If Lucas chose not to believe Miranda's warnings that was his own problem. Miranda had to resist the urge to take the girls out and run up a very large bill but remembered her earlier vow to take the high road.  

Miranda dialed Cassidy's number, "hey Bobbsey. Dinner plans tonight?" 

"I think we're free." Cassidy announced, "I'm walking to Biology right now and if she doesn't give me a monster load of homework, I'm in. Called Caroline yet?"

"Just about to."

"Sweet. Peace out." 

Miranda hung up the call and dialed her other daughter. "Dinner at my house tonight?" 

"Uh... yeah, I just have to cancel something." 

"You don't have to cancel anything, it's not a big deal." 

"No, I want to come over and I don't want to go to this other thing. It's the perfect excuse. I'll see you tonight. Bye." 

Miranda turned the phone over in her hand before deciding to call Jane. "Would you like to come over for dinner with the girls and me tonight?" 

"Who's cooking?"

"Tee-Off. Absurd name but it's a wonderful surf and turf restaurant." 

"What if I cooked?" Jane offered. "I could even do lobster if that's what everyone's in the mood for."

"I don't want to put you out." 

"It wouldn't be putting me out." Jane waved her hand dismissively.  "I love cooking. It's Friday so you have a full fridge, right?"

Miranda smiled, "right."

** 

"Can I help the next person?" Jane smiled amicably. Jake stepped up to the counter and she sighed. "Hi Jake." 

"You're dating a chick?" He demanded. 

Jane grabbed a girl in an apron as she walked by, "Amber, can you man the front for a moment?" The girl nodded and Jane pulled off her apron. "Come to my office." 

"I can't believe you never told me." Jake started as the door to her office was closing. "You accused me of keeping secrets during our marriage, but boy howdy, Jane Rebecca Adler, this is a doozie of a secret."

"There are multiple things wrong with your statement. One, I accused you of not opening up to me -- there's a difference. Two, it _isn't_ a secret -- if it was, you wouldn't know about it. Three, I didn't know I'd be interested in a woman when we were married -- _I_ was faithful mind, body and soul. And four, my middle name is Constance."

"Really?" Jake furrowed his brow in confusion. "Are you sure?"

"Yes..."

"Whose middle name is Rebecca, then?"

"I don't know..." Jane watched him with confusion. 

"Are you sure your middle name isn't Rebecca?" Jake insisted. 

"Would you _like_ to see my birth certificate?" 

"I just don't understand how you're suddenly dating a woman. Are you doing this to punish me?" 

Jane laughed ironically. "Don't flatter yourself. I'm 'doing this' because I met a beautiful, wonderful woman who makes me happy." 

"Angelina Jolie is a beautiful woman and she didn't turn you into a lesbian!" 

"You're being very narrow minded and I don't have to explain myself to you." 

"I... I just don't get it, that's all, Janie. You have to admit it seems a little like a cry for attention. You can call me anytime, I'm single now, you know." Jake wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. 

" _I_ 'm not." Jane sighed with exasperation. "If you'll excuse me, I have an appointment at eleven." She motioned to the door. 

He watched her for a moment before retreating. She followed him out to the front. "Making sure I go?"

"No, waiting for my eleven o'clock." Jane smirked. As if on cue the bells on the front door sounded but it wasn't Miranda. "That would have been so great if that was her..."

Jake nodded, "I'd have to give you that one." 

The door opened again and Miranda entered. "Hello." Miranda said watching Jake with uncertainty. 

"I make a million dollars a year. I'm a named partner at my law firm." Jake announced, puffing out his chest. 

"How nice for you." Miranda furrowed her brow, wondering why she was expected to care. 

"Jake," Jane scolded. 

"How much do _you_ make?" Jake looked down his nose at Miranda. 

"Well, I'm not a named partner at a law firm or anything as fancy as all that," Miranda mocked, "but somehow I manage to scrape by on three mill." 

"Miranda, you don't have to-" Jane tried. 

"I own two cars and a penthouse apartment with an ocean view." 

Miranda sighed, "I also own two cars, a townhouse in New York, a suite at the Ritz in Paris and a home in Santa Barbara with an ocean view." 

"I can bench 350 pounds." 

"I doubt that very much." Miranda smirked. 

Jake narrowed his eyes at her, "alright, you win this round, Priestly." 

"Oh, were we competing?" Miranda feigned sympathy, "you lost pretty badly then, didn't you?" 

Jake huffed out of the bakery. Miranda chuckled to herself and turned to see Jane looking somewhat annoyed. "What?"

"You don't have to play that game with him." Jane shook her head. 

"I've dealt with men like him for my entire adult life. Men like him think that, because I'm a woman, they're more powerful or successful than I am. It just gets to me." 

Jane took Miranda by the arm, "I'm sure that can be frustrating." She said knowingly. "Let me tell you what I had in mind for lunch. I packed a picnic lunch which I was hoping we could ignore at your place while we languish in bed." 

"I _love_ the way you think." Miranda whispered with a grin.

**

Miranda gripped the backboard of the bed as Jane's fingers drove into her. She moaned, "god, yes..." 

Jane pulled Miranda's leg over her shoulder and pushed even deeper into her lover. Miranda groaned as she bucked into Jane's onslaught. 

"Jesus..." Miranda hissed through gritted teeth as she rolled her hips against Jane. 

Miranda's cell phone rang and Miranda reached out deftly and silenced it. Miranda's fingers dug deeper into the backboard as her orgasm mounted. Her cell phone rang and, again, she silenced it. 

Jane's fingers curled inside Miranda and pushed and Miranda cried out as she gave in to her orgasm, writing against Jane as her body trembled. The phone rang again, Miranda silenced it. 

"Why don't you just silence it?" Jane whispered playfully in Miranda's ear. 

"Because I can't do that without looking at it." Miranda ran her fingers through Jane's hair, "and I've been pre-occupied for the last couple minutes." 

"Oh right." Jane smiled triumphantly. She kissed her, "you could do it now." 

Miranda picked up the phone and dismissed the missed calls dialog. "That's strange. All the calls were from my lawyer." The phone rang in Miranda's hands before she had a chance to change the ring settings. She answered it, "David, I'll call you later."

"Miranda, it's urgent." He insisted. 

"I said I will call you back." Miranda snapped. 

Miranda was about to hang up when she heard him shout. "They want to charge you with insider trading." 

Miranda stopped dead in her tracks and brought the phone back to her ear. "What did you just say to me?"

"The Federal Trade Commission wants to charge you with insider trading for dumping your NYC Bank & Trust stocks right before it was revealed that Arnold Milano had embezzled almost all the funds out of the company." 

"You're shitting me. He did not. They're bankrupt?" Miranda sat up, stunned. 

"Why did you sell the stocks if you didn't know they were belly up?" David demanded. 

"Because they're launching investigations into all the banks since the recession. I've met Arnold a dozen or so times and I always got a bad feeling from him. I didn't think he was a good person, at worst I thought there would be a scandal that would bring down the stock prices but I had no idea... They can't charge me with insider trading, I don't work there." 

"Your ex-husband does." 

"Are you kidding me?" Miranda rolled her eyes, "Lucas didn't tip me off. In fact, he didn't sell his shares, doesn't that prove that we weren't somehow in on it?" 

"But your bank records show that he's deposited money into your account." 

"I could strangle the bastard." Miranda groaned. She stood up and wrapped a sheet around herself. She put the phone to her chest and kissed Jane, "I'll just be a second." 

"Take your time." Jane's brow was furrowed in concern. 

Miranda padded down the hall and entered her office. She opened her macbook air. "The money that Lucas deposited in my account are reimbursements for money I spent on Caroline." 

"Miranda, you have to come out here. You have to come back and we'll just nip this in the bud as quickly as possible. There wasn't any insider trading so you should be fine."

"The Trade Commission has been gunning for me for years. It's like a casino, the minute you start winning they suspect you of cheating." 

"Well, to be fair, we haven't exactly seen a stock market savant of your caliber since... I don't know, Rockafeller?" 

Miranda rolled his eyes, "Rockafeller made his money by founding an oil company." 

"Maybe we've never seen a stock trader of your stature." David shrugged. "I bet if you'd been around in 1929 you'd've made money off the stock market crash." 

Miranda chose to ignore David's joke and scowled. "Fine, I'll catch a flight out tonight. In the morning let's having a meeting, you know how to get in touch with my accountant and stock broker?" 

"Yes, I'll set it up. See you tomorrow." 

Miranda hung up and sighed with exasperation. Back in the bedroom she sat down on the bed next to Jane. "I have to go to New York," she pouted apologetically, nuzzling Jane's neck. 

Jane rubbed Miranda's shoulder. "I could go with you. For moral support." 

"I would really love that." Miranda smiled genuinely at Jane.


	3. Chapter 3

The plane touched down in New York at two and when they'd collected their bags and stepped outside, Miranda found Roy waiting for them. 

Emily got out of the backseat, "David called the office and told us you were coming," she explained, straightening her Armani powersuit. 

Roy took their bags and placed them in the trunk. Emily eyed Jane, waiting to be introduced, still not willing to risk asking Miranda a question. 

Jane was feeling a bit overwhelmed at having been met at the airport by Miranda's former entourage. She climbed into the backseat when Miranda motioned toward the open door. Miranda slid in next and Emily sat across from them. 

Emily was the fashion director, she held Nigel's previous position. Emily handed Miranda a schedule, "these are the details of your meeting tomorrow." Despite having moved up in the world from Miranda's doormat, she found it easy and oddly comforting to slip back into the all-too-familiar role. 

Miranda nodded curtly, looking it over. 

"Roy will pick you up at eight." 

**

When Miranda let them into the townhouse she was amazed at how foreign it felt. She'd been gone for only a few months but already it felt like a lifetime since she'd walked its halls. 

Miranda wrapped an arm around Jane, "ready for bed?" 

"Absolutely." Jane nodded, punctuating her point by yawning. 

Miranda gave her a gentle squeeze, "I'm so glad you came with me." She kissed her softly, "I know I mentioned it before we left but I would like to reiterate that we will probably be photographed by the paparazzi during this visit. Don't let it startle you." 

"I'll try." 

**

"Lucas should be at this meeting." Miranda said with annoyance after her lawyer, accountant and stock broker had talked themselves in circles for over an hour. "The whole case hangs on our interactions." 

"The whole thing is horrible speculation." Peter O'Malley, the stock broker said, "I've known you for decades and you've won fortunes on stocks you had zero connection with. I can go back through my records and find the other examples of stocks you've done well on." 

"Did you make money in 2008 when the banks failed?" David asked, looking up from his notes.

Miranda shook her head, "no, I lost money like everyone else." 

"That's good. That's very good." David scribbled something in his notebook. 

Miranda looked over to Helen Reid, the accountant, "you've been quiet." 

Helen shrugged, "there isn't much to add. Looking over your finances the only thing I can say is that if you took payments from Lucas for dumping your stock you should've gotten more than $1,346.94 at a time. Do you have the receipts?" 

Miranda nodded, "I kept copies of everything."

"Did the two of you sign a contract about splitting the twins' finances?" David looked up again.

Miranda shook her head. "No, we were attempting to be civil at the time. We thought we could make parental decisions without our lawyers." 

"Big mistake." David shook his head sadly. 

"However... we discussed it in his office and I believe his assistant was taking notes." Miranda wrote something on the paper in front of her. "I'll meet with him about it." 

"I should come with you." David said pointedly.

Miranda sighed heavily but nodded in agreement.

**

Jane wandered around the townhouse, amazed by another brilliant show of Priestly extravagance. She'd gotten up at 5 and made coffee but had fallen back asleep. Miranda kissed her softly, told her that she'd be back in under two hours and in the meantime Jane was welcome to anything and everything in the townhouse. 

Jane came down the back stairs into the kitchen and found a note scrawled in Miranda's impeccable cursive. _When I get back I'm taking you to lunch. M._

Jane smiled. Her stomach grumbled in protest and decided she'd need a snack to hold her over until Miranda's return. She opened the refrigerator and realized that, of course, Miranda didn't have a grocery boy delivering groceries to her unoccupied townhouse. Jane moved to the cupboards and found a box of crackers and a box of Honey Bunches of Oats with strawberries. It would do nicely. 

It appeared that instead of moving anything from her lavish townhouse to her grand ocean-view home she had opted to buy an entirely new set of things. Jane found a full set of china, a drawerful of silverware and all the other things you'd be likely to find. 

With a bowl of dry cereal Jane gave herself the tour of Miranda's longtime home. Each room was furnished to the nines, art and photographs hung on the wall and not one was a duplicate from Santa Barbara as far as Jane could tell. The girls' rooms were full of things, though immaculately clean, which she doubted was their doing. 

Miranda's closet even contained a full set of clothes and the bathroom was well stocked with shampoo, conditioner, moisturizers, toothpaste, extra toothbrushes and other sundry items. 

Jane washed the bowl when she was finished and decided to step out onto the front stoop to inspect the weather. The first thing she noticed were the trees with brightly colored red, yellow and orange foliage swaying in the breeze, individual leaves falling slowly to damp pavement. Jane smiled. 

The next thing that caught her eye were the people bustling down the street and not one person had even glanced in her direction. There was something wonderful about the New Yorker disinterest. 

Finally, she noticed that she was freezing and that the forty degree November weather did not agree with her California skin. As she was turning to go inside she saw the copy of the New York Times and scooped it up. 

As she shut the door behind her and opened the paper, Page Six fell out. Splashed across the front page was Miranda's face. The headline read _Back in Black: Miranda Priestly Rides Again_. Searching the inside for the rest of the article Jane found a picture of her own face in black and white. 

_Beastly Priestly is back and this time she's canoodling with a middle-aged blond._ This tagline was accompanied by a picture of Miranda with her arm around Jane's waist as she leaned in to whisper into her ear. Jane's smile easily gave away that Miranda's whisper was intimate. 

Jane hadn't even seen the paparazzi. Then again, Miranda had warned her about the paparazzi. She just expected that they would be in their faces, not that they'd be invisible. 

**

"Hey Sachs, see this?" Jimmy dropped Page Six on Andy's desk. "Didn't you used to work for her? Isn't she famous for late nights and long hours with her pretty young assistants?" 

Andy snatched the paper from him. "Shut-up." She scanned the article. 

"So how 'bout it, did you melt the ice queen?" Jimmy leaned in mockingly. 

Andy lashed out and smacked Jimmy. He hissed, cast her a scornful glare and skulked away to lick his wounds. Andy read over the article in shock. "No. Way." 

**

When Miranda entered the townhouse she found Jane in the kitchen reading the paper. "Hey, you want to get lunch before I get arrested?"

"Miranda," she looked up with brow creased deeply with concern. 

"Don't worry. They're probably not going to arrest me." Miranda sat down on the bench seat next to Jane, "at least not today."

"How can you joke about getting arrested? Insider trading is a federal crime." 

"The only way to keep from plotting the mob hit on my ex-husband is to joke." Miranda smirked, "and I'm not really joking. They're not going to arrest me today and I'll probably get out of it." 

"You're so confident." 

"90% is attitude, 10% is innocence." Miranda trailed a finger down Jane's side. "What do you want today? All you have to do is name it." 

"Anything?"

Miranda nodded, "anything." 

"I don't know... is it bad that I kind of just want to hide away in here?" Jane looked apologetic.

"It depends, if you want to stay hidden here because you're overcome with lust for me and want to spend the whole day making passionate love, _definitely not_ bad. If you want to hide because of Page Six..." Miranda said as she slid the insert out from under the paper, "I'd say... a _little_ bad."

"I've never been paparazzied before." Jane admitted sheepishly. 

"Let's give them something to talk about." Miranda smirked, "we'll go out today, have a great time and we'll sell a couple of copies of the New York Times." 

"It doesn't bother you at all?" 

Miranda brushed Jane's blonde hair away from her face, "after everything they wrote about my divorces, it is honestly refreshing for them to take a picture of me smiling." 

Jane nuzzled Miranda's neck, "you have a beautiful smile."

Miranda took Jane's hand and kissed the palm, "and I don't just smile for anyone." Miranda kissed Jane's pulse point. "You should feel special." 

Jane nodded, "I do." 

"I'm so glad you asked to come with me. I wanted to ask you but I was afraid to."

"I can't imagine you being afraid of anything." Jane scoffed. 

"I really don't want to do anything to ruin this." Miranda admitted, "I don't do vulnerable very well. Sometimes when I feel too happy I'm destructive." 

"Me too." Jane whispered, her lips brushing against Miranda's lightly. "I promise to try not to sabotage us if you don't." 

Miranda took Jane's hand, "I'm going to take you out for lunch and then I'm going to take you to see a Broadway play and then we're going to go dancing." 

Jane giggled, "you've sold me." 

**

The whole day was a whirlwind. Jane's head was spinning from all the people recognizing Miranda. She was beginning to understand why Miranda found Jane's hustling, bustling Santa Barbara so peaceful. 

Miranda walked right into swanky restaurants without reservations, she walked up to the ticket window of a sold out show and got them vip seating, she bought them drinks at an upscale bar in Manhattan and was told that the first round was on the house. 

Jane had understood that Miranda had run an important publication in the fashion world but had doubted her reach into other areas and now realized what a mistake she'd made in underestimating her. 

The room was lit by soft, blue lighting on the floor. Miranda and Jane snuggled up on a plush white chaise. Jane had had an aperitif after dinner and was already starting to feel the alcohol going to her head as she sipped her martini. 

"Can I eat your olive?" Jane asked as she leaned close. 

"Is that a come on?" Miranda teased.

Jane grinned, "only if the answer is yes." 

Miranda answered by plucking the olive from her martini and holding it up to Jane's lips. Jane extended her tongue and caught a stray drip of the dry drink running down Miranda's thumb. Miranda let out a soft mm. Jane wrapped her lips around the olive and the fingers holding it up, reaching up she gently held Miranda's wrist as she sucked the olive into her mouth. 

"I've never been a fan of olives until now." Miranda batted her eyelashes. 

"Do you go dancing often?" Jane asked over her drink. 

"Almost never, actually." 

"I feel privileged then." Jane bit her lip coquettishly. 

"Boosting the sales for my magazine, I see." The editor of New York Times stopped by the chaise, "lovely to see you again, Miranda." 

"Oh yes, always a pleasure." Miranda replied curtly. "It's the least I can do to help keep the newspaper business on life support for just a little longer. It will be a shame when it finally goes by the wayside." 

He pursed his lips but said, "your next round's on me." 

"No thank you, when I take a beautiful woman out, I treat her right." Miranda wrapped an arm around Jane. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't get your name."

"That's right. You didn't." Miranda said pointedly. 

He heaved a sigh but tried to hide it. "You ladies enjoy your evening." 

Jane laughed as soon as he walked away. "I love seeing you in your element." 

Miranda downed the rest of her martini, "would you like to do dance while you can still walk?" 

Jane glared playfully, "it's going to take at least three rounds before I'll need help walking."

"Three rounds, hm? That's useful information." 

Miranda led Jane to the dance floor. The club was well attended but not overly crowded and as Miranda wrapped an arm around Jane and began to move with her to the music she didn't know she had a sense of peace. Jane was looser in her movements than Miranda but she figured with another cocktail she'd loosen up as well, the night was young. 

**

Jane groaned as she rolled over in bed. "Every time..." she muttered, clutching her head. 

"Every time, what?" Miranda murmured sleepily. 

"I can't seem to not hang over." 

Miranda snorted, "water, aspirin, greasy food and a small glass of wine." 

"Thanks, _mom_." Jane rolled her eyes goodnaturedly as she pushed herself out of bed. 

A few minutes later Miranda's cell phone rang. She picked it up with a yawn, "yes?"

"How are you feeling?"

"Like a million bucks, thank you." She pushed herself up into a sitting position. 

"I saw Page Six this morning. You've certainly been enjoying yourself. Awfully carefree, aren't we?"

"Lucas, take a deep breath." Miranda rolled her eyes. 

"Both of our asses are on the line here."

"And we shouldn't be on the phone together right now. I'll meet you in your office at eleven, _with_ our lawyers and we'll discuss this." 

"Fine. See you at at eleven." He said and abruptly hung up. 

Miranda dialed Nigel. "I need you to lend me an assistant for a meeting at eleven. Someone not incompetent."

"I'll see what I can do." Nigel said, not put off by Miranda's curt demands or lack of greetings. "Someone will be waiting for you in the car when Roy picks you up." 

"Thank you." She said uncharacteristically and hung up the phone leaving Nigel agape on the other end. 

Miranda poked her head into the ensuite. "How are you doing?" Miranda asked sympathetically as she saw Jane hunched over the porcelain. 

"I'm sick..." she pouted. 

Miranda disappeared from the bathroom leaving Jane to dry heave again and wonder why she'd abandoned her. A few minutes later she returned with a bottle of Pellegrino, a sleeve of crackers and a cup of coffee. "Water first." 

"If I put something in my stomach I'm just going to throw it up," Jane whined. 

"Well, I don't have any intravenous fluids so you're just going to have to drink water, dear." Miranda crouched next to her, opening the bottle and holding it out to her. Jane accepted it suspiciously but took a few tentative sips. Miranda handed Jane a cracker. "Just take it slowly and you'll be fine." 

Jane munched down on the cracker, crumbs falling to the floor as she bit through it. "You're awfully good at this." 

"Steven had a tendency to drink a lot." Miranda admitted tightly. She rubbed Jane's back. "You're going to be fine." 

**

At 10:30 Miranda left the townhouse with insistances from Jane that she'd be fine. Roy held the door open for her and she slid in, scrolling through her iPhone contacts. "Be prepared to take detailed notes, I want a record of this meeting for..." the smell of Starbucks hit her nostrils and she looked up for the first time. 

Andy was holding the latte out to Miranda with a smile. 

"You." 

"Nigel called. Apparently Runway is short on non-incompetent assistants and I happened to be free today." The truth was that she'd had to rearrange her entire day and call in a few favors to be sitting in the back of that town car but she didn't have to tip her hand just yet. 

"I fired you." 

"I _quit_." Andy reminded.

Miranda pursed her lips, "so you did." 

Andy's arm was still extended in offering and the latte was getting harder and harder to ignore. She plucked the steaming cup from Andy's now reddened hand and took a sip. " _Detailed notes_." Miranda emphasized with a growl. 

David was waiting for Miranda when she stepped out of the town car, not even waiting for Roy to open the door. She started barking commands in her usual brash manner and Andy jogged behind her. 

Inside the office Lucas was having a hushed discussion with his lawyer. He stood when Miranda entered. "You're a bitch, you know that."

"It's been mentioned, yes." Miranda tugged off her Hermes scarf and Prada coat and threw them at Andy. Lucas's assistant jumped up to take them from her.

"If you hadn't dumped your stocks we wouldn't be in this mess." He growled. "For all I know, you _did_ get a tip." 

Miranda barely controlled her eye roll as she sat down at the table. Miranda set her briefcase down on the table. She pulled out one large stack of papers bound with a struggling binder clip, "these are my stock activities for the last ten years." She pulled out a slightly smaller stack of papers held by a slightly less abused clip, "these are the records of Cassidy's university expenses." 

Lucas looked up at his nervous secretary, "Natalia, grab my folder about my daughter's college." He rubbed his forehead resignedly. "I'm really up shit creek, Miri." 

"We're going to be fine." Miranda said curtly. "There is no case." 

"Yeah, if I'm not arrested, I'm bankrupt anyway. At least in prison they'd give me food and couldn't take away my living quarters." 

"I wouldn't take that for granted if I were you." Miranda smirked. "Strike Lucas's comments from the records," she whispered to Andy. 

Andy held back a smile at Miranda's occasional tenderness and blacked out Lucas's self-pity. 

Natalia brought the folder back and he opened it. "I have copies of the receipts for your outings with Caroline as well as receipt of payments." 

Miranda nodded, "I have the originals of those receipts as well as the recent activity in my bank account." The documents were handed to the lawyers who went over them and nodded for them to continue. "I also brought a copy of our original custody agreement which contains a clause about spending money on the girls." Miranda passed it to David. 

"Any one item or gift not to exceed a million dollars, except with express written and notarized permission of the other parent." David read it aloud and passed it to Lucas's lawyer. "Well, Paul and I will go to the FTC for a sit down and bring these documents to them." 

"As well as Lucas's financials." Paul said, "once they see how much money he lost there will be no possible way they could think he was involved in this. Without him, Miranda has no feasible link to NYC Bank & Trust." 

David nodded, "I've already allowed them access to Miranda's phone records to prove that she has very limited contact with Lucas and zero contact with Arnold. With any luck this will be the last we'll have to hear about this whole ordeal." 

"Alright." Miranda stood up and shook hands with both lawyers and gave Lucas a small smile. "Hang in there." 

Andy was at Miranda's heels again as she exited the offices. Once in the car Miranda grabbed the notebook from Andy. She read it over and tore out the page and filed it in her briefcase. 

"Anything else, Miranda?"

"That's all." Miranda was still reeling from Andy's presence and rather than give away her surprise she looked coldly out the window. 

Andy tucked the notebook back into her purse. 

Miranda turned to look at Andy again, "I see renouncing me has also meant renouncing good taste." 

"I didn't renounce you." Andy said quietly. 

The car came to a stop and Roy announced, "134 E 73rd." 

Miranda gripped her briefcase and slid out of the car. She was up the stairs with her key in the lock before she chanced a glance at the car. Roy had already pulled away from the curb and Miranda furrowed her brow in thought. 

****************************************************************************

Miranda and Jane sat at the table staring down a looming large order of cheese fries. "I didn't expect them to be _that_ greasy..." Miranda blinked. 

Jane didn't think they looked any more appetizing than Miranda did. "I'm willing to try it if it will make this headache go away..." 

"I'll have a bottle of Tums handy." Miranda grimaced. 

"They might not be that bad..." 

"Jane, I am truly sorry that greasy food was my idea." 

Jane laughed, "I'll probably forgive you." Jane plucked one of the gooey, greasy, cheesy fries from the nest of starch and processed dairy. She tentatively bit the end off and then took another bite. "It's... horrifyingly... delicious. God, it reminds me of smoking pot." She blushed at the admission. "Never thought I'd enjoy cheesy fries sober."

"Another vice revealed." Miranda teased, "I'm fine with the pot smoking, but I'm afraid enjoying grease fries is a deal breaker." 

"Try one." 

"Not without getting seriously stoned myself." Miranda scoffed. 

"Just one? For me?" Jane looked at her, big blue eyes gleaming. 

"You don't play fair." Miranda announced as she pulled a fry from the pile and put it in her mouth, going for the pulling the bandaid off quickly approach. "Hot!" She gasped, grabbing a plate and letting the fry fall out of her mouth. "Jesus..."

"Your coffee might as well be volcanic and you can't take a little melted cheese?" Jane teased, laughing as Miranda scowled and blushed. 

Miranda stood up from the table and threw the plate and the fry into the trash. "Forget it."

"Oh, come on, Miranda," Jane laughed even harder at Miranda's tantrum, "be a sport." 

"I don't like being laughed at." 

"I'm not laughing at you." Jane insisted. Miranda watched her with a grimly serious glare, making Jane laugh harder, "I'm just laughing at your brilliant delivery of situational comedy." 

Miranda huffed but sat back down at the table. "How's your head feeling?" 

"Quite a bit better, actually." Jane grinned. 

Miranda sighed dramatically, "then it's worth it, I suppose." 

Jane kissed Miranda's cheek with a smile and ate another fry. 

"You're going to have to brush your teeth -- _twice_ \-- before we kiss again." 

Jane chuckled and nodded, "as soon as I'm done I'll do that." 

"So, I called in a favor at Runway so that I could bring an assistant to my meeting..."

Jane nodded, "Mhm." 

"Quite surprisingly they sent Andrea but Andrea doesn't work there anymore so why on earth would they have sent her?" Miranda furrowed her brow. "It very neatly threw me off my game." 

Jane felt a slight pang of jealousy considering Miranda's previous admission of having been in some version of love with the girl. "That is odd." She glanced at the cheese fries. "Why don't I brush my teeth and then we can do something together. Just you and I. Maybe take a hot bath."

Miranda smiled, "that sounds wonderful." 

Jane would keep Miranda's thoughts from wandering to Andy if it killed her. Though Jane knew the relative hopelessness of the task she'd set before her considering that it was a puzzle and Miranda viciously and voraciously attacked puzzles until they were solved. 

"Would you like to call her and demand explanation?" Jane asked finally. 

Miranda looked at her, shocked as though the thought hadn't crossed her mind. "I do not wish to be bored with details." 

"It's just us here, Miranda." Jane smiled reassuringly. 

Miranda sighed with frustration, "it's just _strange_ that she would be there. She walked away from _me_ and it's not fair for her to just waltz back whenever she feels like. I don't have to stand for that." 

"Maybe it was her way of saying there are no hard feelings." Jane shrugged. 

"That's not her call. I'm the one who should have hard feelings. It felt more like she was taunting me. She was the only employee who had treated me like I deserved compassion and as soon as I was vulnerable she walked away. And today I sat in the backseat of the car and she was sitting there smiling at me with, holding out a latte."

"Okay, maybe she was saying sorry?" Jane suggested. "Do you still have feelings for her?"

"No." Miranda pursed her lips, "not positive ones. Disdain, contempt, annoyance, disappointment. Those are feelings, I suppose." 

"But don't those feelings come from positive ones? In order to feel disappointment don't you have to feel like you're invested in her?" 

Miranda sighed, "I was once but that was eight years ago." 

"But if you felt like she was taunting you by showing up that means there're still raw feelings there." 

"You've been divorced from Jake for more than ten years and he still makes you mad, do you still have feelings for Jake?" Miranda crossed her arms across her chest. 

"Well, yes, in some ways I'll always care about him but it's different, my children would be affected if anything happened to him. That's the extent of my investment in him." 

"You're blowing this out of proportion." Miranda pursed her lips.

"You're about to be arrested for a federal crime and you're worried about why Andrea showed up at your meeting? _I'm_ blowing things out of proportion?" 

"I'm not going to get arrested." Miranda snapped, nostrils flaring, though the rest of her body stayed rigid and controlled. "The evidence will be reviewed and I won't even be charged. I have had all manner of suits, formal complaints and subpeonas over the years but I have _never_ had an assistant so ballsy as to walk up to me after having quit. That is why I am preoccupied by that occurence." 

Jane was silent. 

"And it feels an awful lot like you're accusing me of wanting to explore my options." 

"Do you?" Jane asked pleadingly, her eyes starting to well up, "do you want to explore your options? What kind of person would I be if I told you you couldn't?" 

"You're a wonderful person for trying to give me permission to but I'm going to have to decline because I am not interested in any other 'options.' In fact, I've been weighing my options my whole life and I can't imagine a better option than you." 

"You're just saying that." Jane pouted. 

"Yeah." Miranda joked. Jane laughed and wiped at her eyes. "Now, I think you promised me a bath..." 

**

"Well, you're still alive, that's a good sign." Nigel laughed as he looked up to see Andy hover in the doorway to his office. "How'd it go?"

"Fine..." Andy hesitated. "At the end right before she got out of the car she said 'I see renouncing me has also meant renouncing good taste.'" 

Nigel smiled, "good for you, that's a very personal insult. She still cares."

"Is that too much to hope for?" Andy bit her lip on a grin. 

"Six, you have to pursue this. Do it for all of us gays who've had a thing for a straight friend. You have a very rare opportunity and you're not just doing it for you, you're doing it for everyone." 

"Only I can prevent forest fires, got it." 

**

"Miranda?" Jane murmured peacefully as she pressed back against her lover in the whirlpool bathtub. 

"Mm?" Miranda nuzzled Jane's ear, reveling in the feeling of her naked breasts sliding against the muscles of Jane's back. 

"Why did you buy a new set of everything for Santa Barbara instead of moving things from the townhouse?" 

Miranda smiled, "what's the point in owning two homes if one of them is empty?" 

Jane thought about that and nodded, "what's the point of having two homes? You can only live in one at a time." 

"New York will always be my home. I lived in this townhouse for over thirty years, I raised my little girls in this house. I couldn't bear to sell it. The girls will inherit it when I die and they can do as they like with it." 

Jane nodded again. "Do you think you'll move back when the girls graduate?" 

Miranda shrugged, "I don't know." 

"I'd miss you if you moved." Jane admitted. 

"They're not graduating for another two and a half years. You'll be sick of me by then, don't worry." 

"You're probably right." Jane teased and chuckled. But honestly, she was worried. She bit her lip and looked down into the water. The lavender bath oil sat on the surface of the water in beautiful swirls of refracted light. 

"How long was your longest marriage?" 

"Six years. I hope that's a non-sequitur." 

"And your shortest?" 

"Five months." 

Jane snorted. "Are you serious?"

"Yes, but we were living together for ten years before that." Miranda ran a hand up Jane's side. "Why do you ask?"

"Just curious." Jane drew her fingers through the oil on the water, sending it in all directions.

"If something was on your mind, you promise you'd tell me?" Miranda whispered. 

Jane took Miranda's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I promise." 

Miranda frowned but squeezed Jane's hand back. 

**

That night Jane snuggled over to Miranda's side of the bed and was surprised to find it empty. She rubbed her eyes and looked over at the clock on the nightstand. 3:46. 

Jane yawned and padded down the hallway and looked down the stairs to see light spilling into the hallway from Miranda's office. She descended and hovered in the doorway knocking lightly on the molding. 

Miranda looked up, "sorry, did I wake you?" 

"Yeah, your typing is thunderous upstairs." Jane smiled. "Whatcha doing?"

"I'm looking up the legal definition of insider trading." Miranda admitted. "Looking up statutes and other cases... what the menu is like in federal prison..." 

Jane pulled a chair up next to Miranda, "you'll be fine. You'll wow them with your wit and your intelligence." 

"My intelligence usually comes off as arrogant." 

Jane eskimo kissed Miranda, "that's because you are arrogant. But that's because you have good reason to be. Nobody does what you do." 

"It's just so frustrating." Miranda scowled.

Jane wrapped her arms around Miranda, pulling the swivel chair with her and held her tightly. Miranda smiled a little and laid her head on Jane's shoulder. 

**

Both women managed to sleep in until almost eight. Miranda was a little snappy because of the time she'd taken out in the middle to stew with worry. Jane took it in stride and handed her a cup of coffee. 

After coffee and a shower the lionness was subdued again. "What would you like to do today?" 

"What if we visited Runway?" Jane asked shyly. 

Miranda grinned. "I'm sure that can be arranged." 

**

The red sea parted for Miranda's return. Stunned clackers threw themselves out of the way, the security guard's eyes widened as he waved her through without a word and people jumped out of the elevators. 

Miranda selected the seventeenth floor while Jane stood watching her in awe. "That was crazy." 

"That was my morning routine." Miranda snickered. The doors slid open and Miranda cast a piercing glance around the office. There were several audible gasps and the sound of the news of her arrival flowing through the grapevine. 

"Jocelyn," Miranda whispered. 

"Oh dear God!" Jocelyn squeezed her eyes closed and clutched her clipboard to her chest. 

"What are you wearing on your feet?" 

"Um," Jocelyn looked down at her feet, afraid to answer, "Uggs?" 

"Is that really the sort of image you want the world to see of Runway?" Miranda pursed her lips.

"They're-they're very popular." Jocelyn insisted. 

" _Runway_ decides what's popular and it is exactly that attitude that has allowed unfortunately named footwear to permeate civilized society. How does it feel to personally contribute to the breakdown of the whole fashion system?" 

"That was cruel." Jane scolded while trying to hide the fact that she was smiling. 

"I hate Uggs. I would like everyone who wears them to come up to me and explain themselves." 

"You deplore explanation." 

Miranda gave a reserved smile, "I didn't say I'd _listen_ , I'd just delight in watching them suffer." 

"I know what I'm getting you for Christmas..." Jane announced in a sing-song manner. 

"You wouldn't dare." Miranda whispered. 

"Do my eyes deceive me?" Nigel grinned as he stepped up to Miranda, "it's fantastic to see you." 

Miranda offered her former fashion director a small but sincere smile. "Nice to be back for a visit." Miranda wrapped an arm around Jane, "I'd like to introduce Jane."

"Ah, yes, my dear, I recognize you from the gossip column. Enchantee." Nigel smiled and turned to Miranda, "where on earth did you find a _real_ woman? I was beginning to think there weren't any left." 

Miranda gave Jane a gentle squeeze. "there aren't. I've found the last one."

Jane smiled, feeling a little overwhelmed. She wasn't sure if being a 'real woman' was a good thing in this context or if he'd just called her fat. Looking around at the women who skirted by and the models trying to inch by unnoticed she felt pretty fat. 

Nigel's eyes left Miranda's for a millisecond to glance at her waistline. "How's California treating you?" 

Miranda smirked, "lavishly, thank you for noticing. Jane's a baker." 

"You don't say." Nigel grinned. "To what do we owe your unnerving presence?" 

"Let's call it a surprise inspection." Miranda smirked. "I'd like a run through in," she looked at her watch, "twenty minutes. We'll be in the conference room."

Twenty minutes later Nigel, Jocelyn, Emily and her unfortunate assistant Jason shuffled into the conference room with racks of clothing. Jocelyn had changed into a pair of kitten heel Prada pumps. Miranda gave her an approving nod as she walked by and Jocelyn was visibly relieved. 

"Emily's been working on a spread incorporating bright colors into the usually muted shades for fall and winter." Nigel said as he sat down. 

Emily felt like Nigel had just thrown her under a bus. "Yes, I kept the traditional blacks and browns but wanted to make sure to incorporate splashes of color." She pulled a pleated black Gucci skirt from the rack and handed it to Jocelyn and selected a bright yellow tank top with black lace. "The look would be complete with lace gloves and a Jimmy Choo cuff boot." 

"And where are these fantastic accessories?" 

"I sent my assistant to fetch them," Nigel cleared his throat, "nearly fifteen minutes ago..." 

A skinny bleached blond boy burst into the room. "I'm sorry it took me so long Kara has the gloves for a shoot and the boots were the wrong size."

"That's fine, Dennis." Nigel assured. 

Miranda stood, "Dennis, is it?"

"Yes, ma'am." He nodded. 

"Come here, Dennis." 

Dennis gulped and walked up to Miranda. "When you are asked to complete a task you _do it_. You do not return to the room without the items and if it takes you longer than fifteen minutes you don't come back." Miranda whispered menacingly. 

Dennis took an unsteady step backwards. "Yes, ma'am." 

"Emily?" Miranda cocked her head towards the brit, "go fetch." 

Emily nodded and fled the room. "Dennis, you will sit and you will see how a real assistant does her job." Miranda sat back down next to Jane. Jane sucked in a breath as quietly as possible, afraid that Miranda would attack her Payless boots at any moment. 

Within three minutes Emily reentered the room with a pair of black lace gloves and a pair of Jimmy Choo cuff boots.  "Dennis, this is behavior to emulate." She accepted the items from Emily and nodded her approval. "May I see an outfit that contains brown, as well?"

Emily beamed as she continued her preview. 

**

"You've been quiet." Miranda said, turning to look at Jane as they sat in the car on their way to lunch. 

Jane shrugged, "you had everything under control." 

Miranda took Jane's hand and gave it a squeeze. "Not the sort of tour you were expecting?"

"Why do you say that?" Jane looked over at Miranda. 

"Thought you'd get a tour of the office but instead got a tour of my character flaws?" Miranda prodded. 

"No... it's not that... I wouldn't say they were personality flaws, just... I would never treat my employees like that." 

"The bakery is different than a magazine. If one cog in the machine isn't functioning the whole issue goes down with it. There just isn't room for close enough in the magazine. Not to mention that the competence level is likely higher in the bakery."

Jane shrugged. "I guess." 

"I was very proud of Emily, she's really come into her own." Miranda nodded. 

"So why didn't you tell her you were proud of her?"

"I did," Miranda insisted, "I smiled and nodded." 

"I guess I just don't understand how the magazine business runs." Jane shrugged again. 

"Besides, New York is meaner and I still have an Empire State of Mind." 

Jane took Miranda's hand, "I guess... what I want to know... is what stops you from talking to me like that?"

"You don't work for me or at a fashion magazine?" Miranda gave Jane's hand a squeeze, "besides, you wear decent knock-offs. Your boots are a reimagining of Alexander McQueen buckle boots from 2008. They're classic." 

Jane slid over on the leather seat and tucked herself under Miranda's arm. Miranda wrapped her arm around Jane and kissed her temple.

**

Miranda's phone was vibrating on the counter as Jane was attempting to teach Miranda how to make truffles. "Phone's ringing." Jane said, glancing back at it.

"My hands are sticky can you..." Miranda looked over at Jane's equally messy fingers. She picked up a butter knife from the counter and pressed the speaker button. "Hello Nigel." 

"I'll have you know my assistant just quit. I have meetings galore today and now I don't have an assistant." 

Miranda snorted, "all I did was give the boy some career advice. I even stayed away from the atrocious hair and the abysmal blue jeans." 

"I need an assistant!"

"Then you should have two. There was a reason for the first and second assistant arrangement. Nor shall I mention that the boy bears a startling resemblance to Xavier, the one that got away." 

"How generous of you not to bring it up..." Nigel rolled his eyes. 

"Why don't you call Andrea, she seems to be eager to jump back into the bridle." Miranda snapped and ended the call. 

"Xavier?" Jane raised an eyebrow.

"A little over twenty years ago Xavier was my second assistant. He was a beautiful boy, blonde, green-eyed, freckled nose, well-defined cheekbones. He was quite an asset, he was fastidious, quick, eager, sharp as a tack and had an amazing eye for fashion. Somehow he was as straight as an arrow but Nigel fell for him anyway. I ended up having to give Xavier a recommendation to Vogue to bring Nigel's focus back to his work."

"So you think Nigel wasn't seeing Dennis clearly?" 

"Definitely not. You don't serve under me for thirty years and then say 'that's fine, Dennis.'" Miranda rolled a truffle in the cocoa powder. 

Jane nodded, "fair enough."

Miranda reached the end of the chocolate truffles. "Well, that was a very long process." 

"If we didn't let them sit overnight they'd be too gooey." Jane insisted. She plucked one of the freshly powdered balls from the rest and held it up, "try one." 

"I'm kind of afraid to," Miranda admitted, Jane had given instruction but allowed Miranda to measure and mix everything. Gingerly, she leaned in and bit the truffle in half. 

"They're bite-sized, honey-" Jane paused and blushed at the use of the term of endearment. "Do you like it?" 

"Yes, it's sweet." Miranda smiled. 

"Really? They shouldn't be that sweet, we got everything dark chocolate." Jane furrowed her brow. 

"No, I mean 'honey.' I like it, it's sweet." 

Jane blushed again, "oh." She smiled shyly, "I was afraid you wouldn't like it. It just sort of slipped out. I was just smiling and there it was." 

Miranda leaned over and kissed Jane. "You taste worlds better than the truffles." 

"Then you must have done something wrong." Jane teased and wrapped her arms around Miranda. "Oh no!" She exclaimed as she realized she'd just rubbed her chocolatey fingers on Miranda's cashmere. 

Miranda laughed and cupped Jane's cheeks, smearing chocolate on her cheeks. "Everything comes out in the wash." 

**

Jane turned on the shower and double checked to make sure that the door was locked and pulled out her cell phone.

"Hi Jane," Dr. Nemo greeted, "there's a lot of noise on your end. Do we have a bad connection?" 

"I'm... I'm in the bathroom and I turned the water on." 

"Why?" 

"In case Miranda comes home early." Jane shrugged. She spread out the paper she had written on on the vanity. "I've made a list... it helped me with Jake and I think it... I don't know, I feel even more confused than with Jake." 

"We'll just take it one step at a time. What does your list say?" Dr. Nemo asked gently, used to dealing with Jane's occasional flights of neuroses. 

"One. Why am I trying to find things to worry about? Everything's going so well and I'm happy but I just... can't stop _worrying_."

"You're going through a lot of new things right now. It's natural to feel apprehensive but you should just make sure you're keeping your mind open, being honest with yourself as well as Miranda." 

"Right. That sort of brings me to the next thing on my list. I'm like a penguin, you know?"

"Mhm, you mate for life." Dr. Nemo nodded. 

"Right, and Miranda's a beautiful peacock. You know she's been married three times? Her longest marriage was six years. She gets tired of everything, she has multiple sets of everything." 

"Actually, female peacocks are plain, it's only the male peacocks that have the famous feathers. Also, I'm fairly certain peacocks also mate for life." 

Jane blinked for a moment, "facts aside, I think you understood my metaphor anyway." Jane sighed, "I just. I just feel like she's going to get tired of me. I don't fit in with her friends. They think I'm making Miranda fat and she's still four or five dress sizes skinnier than me!" 

"It doesn't matter what Miranda's friends think. The only thing that matters is what you and Miranda think." 

"Right... okay, also, there's this young woman that Miranda used to be in love with who just showed up out of the blue and that worries me. I think Miranda still has feelings for her." 

"Okay, Jane." Dr. Nemo said thoughtfully, "why don't you turn off the shower, take a deep breath, relax and we'll talk about everything that's on your mind?"

"I'm just... afraid that I... love her." She admitted in a whisper as though she were ashamed to admit it. "I'm afraid that she's... that I'm... that we're..." 

"You're worried she won't return your feelings." Dr. Nemo said knowingly. 

"Right... but, I mean. Am I in love? Am I in love with _Miranda_ or am I in love with the _idea_ of Miranda? I love her but am I _in_ love with her?" 

"Are those bullet points on your list?" Dr. Nemo asked. 

"Yeah, they're points eight through ten." Jane bit her lip. "I just don't want to jump head first into this if it's just going to break my heart. I feel like I want to share my forever with this woman and what if she doesn't want to share her forever with me?" 

"Maybe you should talk to her about it. It seems that the only way to actually get answers to a lot of these questions is to talk to Miranda." 

Jane sighed, "but what if I tell her I love her and I want to be with her forever and she says no and we break up whereas if I don't say anything and then later on down the line we break up I won't have lost that time?" 

"At the risk of sounding like a broken record... you really should discuss it with Miranda." Dr. Nemo switched the phone to the other ear. "You've known her for about two months, you've been dating her for one. For argument's sake, what if you're just feeling infatuation right now? Maybe you're _not_ in love with her yet, what if you just enjoyed her company for a while without trying to label it or put pressure on yourself? Forever is a lot of pressure to put on yourself. You have to just relax and let your relationship happen naturally." 

"Yeah..." Jane said biting her lip.

"Jane, you can't live forever, you can only live a moment. In this moment are you happy with Miranda?"

"I am, yeah." Jane nodded, "god, you always know exactly the right thing to say." 

"That's what you pay me for." Dr. Nemo laughed, "okay, Jane, here are my parting words: one moment at a time." 

"Okay, got it." She nodded.

**

"They're not happy about it but they don't have any grounds to sue you and they're not going to pursue the matter." David handed Miranda a cup of coffee. "Suspicious though it may look that you dumped the stocks at the most opportune moment possible, there are no plausible connections between you and the bank and that's where the investigation ends. I wouldn't worry because as long as you _are_ innocent, there can be no new evidence." 

Miranda nodded. "Clean as a whistle." 

"Good." David sat down, "now, I do have a few more things to advise. I know you're not overly prone to sentiment but should you feel the desire or sympathy to reach out to Lucas, fight it. You cannot call him and you cannot offer him any financial support." 

Miranda pursed her lips to conceal a frown. "I spent six years supporting him and I certainly don't intend to do it again." She stood up and held out her hand to shake David's. "Thank you for your continued representation." 

"Miranda, you're my favorite client." He shook her hand. 

"Of course I am, three divorces, two pre-nups, four custody suits, two lawsuits for slander and now a near miss with the Federal Trade Commission. I paid for your house in the hamptons." 

David laughed, "and I'm thinking of getting an addition. Let me know if you want to get married again."

"I don't think marriage is exactly an option open to me right now. Honestly, I would rather die than live in Vermont."


	4. Chapter 4

"Jane?" Miranda called as she walked into the townhouse. She entered the kitchen and opened the refrigerator, reaching back and extracting a bottle of Antech Blanquette de Limoux grande reserve 2003. 

She furrowed her brow, "Jane, are you here?" She climbed the stairs. Miranda heard the shower running and then stop and Jane stepped out of the bathroom. 

Jane let out a small yelp of surprise. "Miranda, you startled me."

Miranda blinked in surprise. "Shower. Fully clothed. Cell phone. Is there something I'm missing?" 

"No," Jane shook her head, "no. I was just going to take a shower and I heard you coming so I turned the shower off and I had my phone in there in case you called." 

"Oh, okay." Miranda smiled, "so how about we take that shower together?"

"Hold on," Jane took Miranda's free hand. "That was a lie. I was talking to my psychologist. On the first anniversary of my divorce I had a little bit of a nervous breakdown and I've been seeing a psychologist ever since and because of our side trip to New York I missed my regular session." 

"You don't have to explain yourself to me." Miranda offered her a smile, "you certainly don't have to lie either." 

"I know." Jane nodded, "I know I don't have to explain myself but I want to... _share_ myself with you. You make me really happy, Miranda." 

Miranda smiled sincerely, "you make me happy, too." She leaned in and kissed her softly. "Now, I'm feeling celebratory and I would like to lap champagne out of your belly button. How does that sound to you?" 

"Sounds like after you do that you'd better share." Jane grinned as she began unbuttoning Miranda's blouse. 

Miranda maneuvered them into the bathroom and set the champagne bottle down on the vanity and began removing Jane's clothes. When they were both naked Miranda ran her hands over Jane's body and held her close. Jane laid her head on Miranda's shoulder, "I can feel your pulse in your neck." 

"Thank goodness, I thought I'd stopped breathing." Miranda teased.

Jane smacked Miranda in the ass with a laugh. Miranda retrieved the bottle and unwrapped the top, "get in the tub, it might bubble over." 

Jane climbed into the spacious whirlpool tub and Miranda followed her. She hooked her thumb under the cork and after a moment's effort it popped off. The bubbly liquid overflowed from the bottle and drenched Jane's lap. 

"That's cold!" She yelled in surprise. 

"I keep it in the refrigerator, you're supposed to serve champagne chilled." Miranda dipped her head to run her tongue over Jane's thighs. 

Jane moaned and leaned back, her eyes slipping shut. Her eyes snapped open again as Miranda poured champagne over her stomach. Jane met Miranda's eyes as Miranda dipped her tongue into her belly button. Jane mmed and lifted her hips off the ceramic in encouragement. 

Miranda tipped the bottle and sent champagne cascading between Jane's legs. She groaned as a surge of arousal shot through her and whimpered as Miranda nestled in between her thighs. Miranda's warm, wet tongue pressed against Jane's clit and she hissed. 

"Yes..." Jane ran her fingers through Miranda's hair, gently kneading the scalp under the white locks. 

"I love champagne," Miranda whispered seductively against Jane. She swirled her tongue around Jane's lips, dipping her tongue inside of her and back up to lavish attention to her clit. 

Jane arched her back encouragingly. 

Miranda pushed three fingers into Jane. Jane cried out and lashed out to grab onto the sides of the tub. Miranda curled and twisted her fingers inside the other woman as she swept her tongue over the sensitive bundle of nerves. 

Jane cried out again when she couldn't stave off her orgasm any longer and laid in the tub in a daze for a moment.

When she opened her eyes again, Miranda was hovering over her with a grin. "Hi." 

Jane smiled and laughed, reaching up and covering Miranda's face with her hand. "My turn," Jane shifted, trying to move around so Miranda could lie down. 

Jane began her turn meticulously and with keen calculation. She dripped tiny pools of bubbles onto Miranda's hot skin and made sure that she drank every drop. She started her torture at Miranda's collarbone and slowly worked down her torso. 

When Jane got to Miranda's belly button she stopped. Miranda glanced up. Jane gently ran her fingers along a line on Miranda's abdomen. "I've never noticed this before." 

Miranda's hands flew up to cover the offending mark, knowing full well what Jane was referring to. She started to sit up, struggling to do so without using her hands while she slipped around in champagne.

"Hey, you don't have to hide it from me." Jane furrowed her brow. "I didn't mean to bring it up if it's a sore subject." 

"It's fine. Forget it." Miranda pulled herself up out of the tub. 

"Miranda, I'm sorry." Jane insisted as she followed her out. 

"Jane, I said it's _fine_." Miranda snapped. She sighed, "I'm not... _mad_ at you. It just sort of puts me in a bad mood." Miranda's hand was still clamped over the scar as she pulled a towel around her. 

"You're just going to hide your stomach from me forever?" 

Miranda hesitated and pursed her lips. "Forever's an awfully long time, isn't it?" 

"Maybe..." Jane bit her lip, covering herself in a towel as well. "Will you talk to me? You don't have to tell me what happened but, please, let's keep the lines of communication open." 

"Okay, fine." Miranda plopped down on the closed toilet seat. "I don't like it because it reminds me of my weaknesses." 

"Scars aren't reminders of our weaknesses. They're reminders of our triumphs and reminders of the remarkable resilience of human bodies." Jane tipped over the empty waste bin and sidled up to Miranda. "I've had several, probably around twenty, first and second degree burns from hot food over the years. I've had stitches twice, once from appendicitis and once from rushing to finish a catering order." 

Miranda took Jane's hand and kissed her palm. "I'm not bothered by scars." She laid her left hand on Jane's. "The scar up my thumb is from one of the only times I tried to make my daughters' halloween costumes. I have a burn behind my ear from a curling iron, a burn behind my knee from hot wax. Scars are evidence of a life that's been lived." 

"I guess I don't understand what makes that scar different." Jane rubbed Miranda's knee comfortingly. 

"But it is. It is different and it makes me feel... bad... and that's all I have to say about it for the moment. I am not trying to close the lines of communication but I'm not going to talk about it right now." 

"That's fine. Are you hungry? Let's have lunch." 

**

"My kitchen manager just called." Jane entered the home office where Miranda was pouring over her market research. 

Miranda turned around and furrowed her brow. "And?"

"And maybe things aren't so different at the bakery than at Runway. I guess a week is too long to trust them to run smoothly in my absence." Jane gave Miranda a small smile, "I booked myself a flight, I'm leaving kind of right away. I know that you're staying to help out with the photoshoot."

"I don't have to stay. I can go home with you." Miranda took Jane's hand. 

Jane gave it a squeeze, "just the fact that you would is enough for me." She brought the hand to her lips and kissed the soft knuckles. "You stay and I'll see you when you get back."

"I'll call Roy. I'll take you to the airport."

"I already called a cab." Jane shook her head.

"You already called a cab? You really meant it when you said right away." Miranda furrowed her brow. "Do you have to fly coach for that last minute booking?"

Jane laughed, "some people fly coach because it's cheaper." 

"That's a terrible reason to do something," Miranda stood up from her chair. "Well, I'll at least walk you downstairs." 

As they stood on the front stoop in the chilly late autumn air Miranda threaded her fingers through Jane's. "Will you call me when you land? I know it will be late here." 

Jane nodded, "I will." 

The yellow cab pulled up in front and Jane wrapped her arm around Miranda's shoulder and kissed her softly then gave her an amorous hug. "I'll call as soon as I touch down." 

Miranda released her, "have a nice flight." 

Miranda watched the cab pull away and wished that she hadn't agreed to stay for the shoot. Miranda Priestly was a woman of her word and she wouldn't go back on it now. 

**

Jane sat behind a screaming baby and she thought back to Miranda's reservations about coach and had to smile. 

"I'm sorry, he's teething." The young mother turned around to address Jane. 

"I've had three of my own, don't worry." Jane waved her hand dismissively with a smile. She put on the provided head phones to watch the in-flight movie.

**

Miranda's phone woke her up around 11:30. "Hello," she murmured. 

"Hey sleepy," Jane smiled, "I just picked up a cab and I'm on my way home now." 

"While I have you on the phone, I wanted to tell you about the scar on my stomach." Miranda rolled over onto her back. 

"You don't have to if you don't want to." 

"I want to," Miranda insisted. "My first husband, Rich and I were together for ten years. We put off getting married because I wanted to be really established before I got married. My mother quit her job two years after she got married and I didn't want that. Runway became Elias Clark's most profitable publication and we attracted a wealth of new investors and we started up French Runway and we finally surpassed Vogue in sales and reach so I finally agreed to marry him. When we got married I kept my name and the papers started calling him Mr. Priestly. He got more and more agitated that I was more successful than he was. We fought constantly but it only got physical once. My mother had framed one of the articles about me and Rich pulled it from the wall and was shaking it at me and we were both screaming and he broke the frame over the bedpost so I hit him and he hit me back and I ended up on the floor and Rich held me down and wouldn't let me up for several minutes. He held me down on the glass and in my struggle to get away from him my stomach got very cut up. One or two of the cuts probably should have been stitched. As I stood up, bits of glass falling from my stomach, blood soaking into my blouse, Rich went wide-eyed and started apologizing. Whatever rageful spell he was under lifted but mine was just getting started and I hit him in the head with one of the pieces of the frame and kicked him out and we didn't speak without our lawyers ever again." 

Jane was silent for a few long moments. 

"Are you still there?" Miranda asked softly. 

"Yeah," Jane nodded, "I'm sorry... I just... I'm stunned. I have a hard time... imagining... you being vulnerable." 

"I was ashamed of myself for starting it and I was ashamed of myself for lashing out and not dealing with the situation more rationally." 

"You didn't start it." 

"I threw the first punch." Miranda reminded. 

"But he broke the frame, he was itching for a fight." Jane insisted. "He didn't respect you. Breaking the frame was very symbollic, he threw the first punch by breaking the frame. Then it got worse because you're not a fragile woman who'll back into a corner and cry. You're an incredibly strong-willed person who should never be underestimated. You have made quite a few men feel immasculated because of how powerful you are. That's your curse and your gift. I love that you never compromise yourself." 

"I never got stitches for the deeper cuts because I didn't want to admit that I let him overpower me. I think I'm just as guilty as he is when it comes to getting enraged over loss of control."

"Maybe... except for the fact that his loss of control was an illusion. He perceived that he lost control over you because you didn't need him for financial support. You lost your control because he forcibly held you in a situation you didn't want to be in. He didn't have to stay." 

"I thought we were in love." Miranda admitted softly. "It was hard coming to terms with the fact that we weren't."

"Who said you weren't? Love can be very blinding. That's something Jake never had to worry about with me. I depended on him. Not necessarily for money, I've always been able to make my own money but I really felt like I needed him and I never challenged his perception of himself as a man." 

"But you figured out that you didn't need him." 

"When I had my panic attack and I started seeing Dr. Nemo, it wasn't because I _thought_ it would be a good idea it was court mandated." Jane confessed hesitantly.

Miranda snorted a laugh, "you're joking." 

"I was upset because Jake was taking Agness on vacation on our anniversary. It's not like I was in denial about the divorce I just thought our anniversary should be sacred. Like when you retire a number in baseball. I was distraught and preoccupied and I got involved in a fender bender. The man jumps out of the car yelling 'fucking women drivers' and I really lost it. I started screaming and I could find my insurance card in my bag and I slammed it into the car until everything fell out which made me angrier. Someone called the police and when a cop grabbed me by the arm I didn't realize he was the police and I elbowed him in the nose." 

Miranda was stunned into silence until she broke out into laughter. 

"Well, I'm glad you find it funny." Jane smirked.

"No, it's only a little funny because it's so out of character. I think I would have wailed on the nearest policeman if someone had just yelled 'fucking women drivers' at me too." 

Jane blushed and laughed, "I didn't wail on anyone." 

"There's another thing we have in common. We both lash out violently when threatened. We're a force to be reckoned with." Miranda grinned. 

"You bet your ass we are, Priestly." Jane smiled. "I'm almost home, I'm going to let you go back to bed. Thank you for sharing with me." 

"Thanks for being a good listener." 

**

Miranda was wrapped up in her black wool Prada coat with faux fur trim as she sipped her starbucks in a vip chair. 

Emily checked the notes on her clipboard as she oversaw the set-up for the shoot. "Everything ship shape, mate?"

"Never say that again." Emily drawled, scribbling something on her notes and directing a laborer to move one of the lights. "It's going perfectly well, thank you." 

"Alright." He sidled up next to her causing her to furrow her brow in annoyance. "There's no need to feel nervous because Miranda's here."

"I don't feel nervous because Miranda's here." Emily checked a few things off her list and capped her pen. "I am one hundred percent confident in my abilities to do my job. Don't push off your fear of inadequacy onto me."

"My... fear of inadequacy?" Nigel scoffed, "oh, please!" 

"Nigel!" Miranda called and Nigel jumped. 

"Face it. You were her bitch then, you're her bitch now and you will always be her bitch." Emily snickered. 

"Yeah, let's not forget which one of us had to detail her car after her dog had the shits in the backseat." 

Emily shuddered and looked back to her clipboard.

"That's what I thought. Who's the bitch no-"

"Nigel!" Miranda snapped with more ferocity.

"Coming Miranda." He ran to her.

Emily chuckled to herself, "somehow it's still you..." 

Miranda scowled as Nigel approached her. She looked at her watch, "is it beyond you to set up a simple photoshoot in under half an hour?" 

"It's not that simple." Nigel insisted, "it's all about the morning light. We have all the models in place and we're just waiting for the light to come through the trees to create the right shadows." 

Miranda sighed heavily. "In that case I'm going to need another latte." 

He accepted her empty paper coffee cup and smirked, "yes, I'll get right on that." He stood and joined Emily again. "Okay, it's me. I'm the bitch. As such I'm going to go get her a latte. You good here if I'm gone for a few minutes?" 

"Yup. I could use a venti skinny chai though." 

Nigel narrowed his eyes at her. "If I'm feeling charitable when I walk up to the counter..." 

"Oh no." Emily furrowed her brow, her mouth fell open. "Here comes trouble with a capital A." 

Nigel followed Emily's gaze to see Andy sauntering onto the set. "No, that's cool. I invited her." 

"You invited Miranda and Andy to the same photoshoot? I take it back, you're not a bitch, you're the idiot to end all idiots." Emily hissed, "Miranda will eat her alive and then pick her teeth with the bones and then she'll skin you and turn your body into a throw rug." 

"Relax, would you? Miranda was in love with Andy. Andy was in love with her. I think that enough time has elapsed that they can let bygones be bygones." 

Emily blinked at him. "...have you _met_ Miranda?"

"Hello," Andy said casually, sitting next to Miranda.

Miranda turned, somewhat startled. She furrowed her brow. "Stop doing that." 

"Doing what? Bringing you a latte?" She held up the steaming beverage.

Miranda snatched it out of her hand. "Among other things." 

"I think we should talk." Andy continued, forging ahead despite the cold shoulder she was getting from the older woman. "I would really love the chance to explain myself." 

"You don't deserve it." Miranda pursed her lips.

"Maybe I do, maybe I don't. I think I was your faithful servant girl for long enough that you can spare me a couple of minutes." 

"I owe you nothing." Miranda scoffed. "Your hourly wage was compensation for the meaningless errands you ran while you were my assistant. You already owe me a minute of my life that I will never get back from having to sit here and explain to you why you are unworthy of my time." 

Andy sipped her own coffee. "I think if you really didn't want to talk to me you could have made your _no_ a little shorter." 

Miranda snorted, "be that as it may..." she said dismissively. 

"When the photoshoot lets out meet me at the Starbucks across the street." 

Miranda cast Andy a tired glare. 

"If you don't I'll just keep popping up and it's going to start getting awfully tiring trying to fend me off all the time." Andy stood up and had the nerve to smile playfully. "I'll be waiting." 

Miranda glared at the girl's retreating form. She sipped the latte begrudgingly. 

Once the shoot was over Miranda gave Emily a slight nod. Emily could barely contain her excitement. Miranda walked up to the the car and glanced at the Starbucks across the street before sliding into the towncar. 

**

Lauren, Luke and Gabby were shown into Jake's office by his secretary. He smiled hugely, "hey kids, it's great to see you all here. To what do I owe the pleasure." 

Luke looked up at his father. "Dad, we love you." 

"But you have to leave mom and Miranda alone." Lauren finished definitively. "We know that you've been contacting her as of late and she's too polite to ask you to stop." 

"Miranda seems to make her happy in the least neurotic way mom is capable of." Gabby added. 

"And you know we don't mean just, 'hey Jane, how's it going?' we mean the more inappropriate interactions." Lauren added. 

Jake scoffed, "inappropriate? I don't know what you're talking about." 

"Dad, before you make an ass out of yourself, you should know I was at mom's house watering the plants when you called and left that message..." Luke admitted quietly.

"Oh shit, which one?" Jake's eyes were wide. 

"Two of them, actually." 

"Christ, how long does it take you to water plants?" Jake fidgeted. 

"It was a long message. I guess it cut you off and you had to call back to finish it..." Luke frowned.

Jake cleared his throat and straightened up, "yes, well..."

"We just want you to know that we've seen her with Miranda several times and Miranda is really good to her and for her and she just seems so happy. She's moving forward with her life, dad, you need to let her." 

"And she's too polite to tell me all this herself?" Jake asked. 

Gabby nodded, "you know mom." 

"Yeah... I did," Jake pulled out his cell phone and dialed his voicemail and put it on speaker. Their mother's voice came through loud and clear:

" _Jake! I just got home and listened to all those messages you left on my machine. That is entirely uncalled for. I am giving you this one opportunity to stop before I make you rue the day you were born._ " 

The three children stood stunned for a moment before Gabby laughed, "Miranda's _very_ good for her." 

"I just have one question." Jake said as he flipped his phone shut and tucked it back into his suit jacket. "Miranda doesn't have mob contacts, does she?"

**

"You shouldn't have this number." Miranda pursed her lips. 

"I waited for you for three hours." Andy said, plowing ahead. 

"I don't take orders." Miranda said curtly. 

"How about a plea then?" Andy asked. Miranda stayed silent so she continued. "I am begging for the chance to talk to you. If you don't like what I have to say then I'll never bother you again." 

"Ever?"

" _Ever_." Andy nodded, "just name the time and place."

Miranda thought back to Jane's jealousy over Andrea. Miranda knew it was unfounded but was worried that the paparazzi would snap pictures of them together. Miranda sighed inwardly. "Where are you right now?" 

"On the steps outside the Mirror." 

"Okay. Stay there." 

Andy grinned, "you're coming here?" 

"No. I'm staying right where I am to. We're going to do this right now and over the phone." Miranda settled into the settee in the sitting room. "You said I could name the time and place, didn't you?"

"I did, I just thought... I thought we could speak face to face." 

"It would appear that _thinking_ is only the first of your problems." Miranda snapped. She looked at her watch, "you have exactly five minutes." 

"Miranda, I've never been able to stop thinking about you. I've never been able to fall out of love with you." Andy started, realizing she had this one chance. "In Paris, I saw you cry and I wanted nothing more than to hold you and kiss you and I realized how in love with you I was. I know you felt at least some of that for me. The way you looked at me changed, the way you talked to me. Then when you cost Nigel his promotion... when you hurt your closest friend like that... I got scared. I thought even if you loved me could I ever really trust you? Would I spend my whole life waiting for the other shoe to drop? Then in the car... you had no remorse... you were proud of me for trying to warn you and you... _smiled_. Nigel was crushed and you were _smiling_. I thought... I had to walk or way or I'd never be able to walk away. But I understand now that I wasn't ever able to just walk away. Not after Emily called me back to the office, I couldn't have walked away from you without regret and fear that I'd ruined something that could have been beautiful. I love you, Miranda, I love you so much it hurts." 

Miranda was silent on the other end. For a brief moment of panic Andy thought that she'd hung up on her. Then she heard a sniffle on the other end and breathed a silent sigh of relief. 

" _You broke my heart_." Miranda said slowly, trying to hold back her tears. "What did you expect me to do? Lose my husband, my magazine and my dignity all in one fell swoop? I made it up to Nigel. If you loved me at all you should have realized that I'm not a monster." 

"I know you're not a monster." Andy wiped at her own tears. 

"You were right, Andrea, the way I looked at you, the way I spoke to you, the way I thought about you, it did change. I fell in love with you." 

Andy smiled, "I'm so happy to hear you say that,"

"But what you did... you abandoned me. You abandoned me the day after I was served with divorce papers. You didn't contact me again for five years." 

"Miranda, I..." Andy stuttered,

"You had the gaul to wait until you knew for sure that I would date a woman to even try to talk to me again. You have the nerve to confess your love when you know I'm already in a relationship. You're the worst kind of coward, Andrea Sachs." Miranda spat, "you waited until you thought it was safe and then you stirred all the old hurt back up and that is selfish."

"Miranda, I'm so sorry..." Andy cried. 

"Don't be sorry just learn from your mistakes." Miranda snapped. "Goodbye, Andrea." Miranda ended the call and wiped at her eyes. She was surprised at how much better she felt. Just having voiced her feelings of hurt and betrayal to Andrea had lifted them from her shoulders, no longer weighing her down. 

One thing did begin to nag at her then. How did Andrea get the unlisted new number? It dawned on her that she must have had an accomplice. It wouldn't have been Emily, Emily wouldn't help her grandmother out of burning building if it was two minutes out of her way. Jocelyn was too timid to risk upsetting Miranda. Nigel was just the right amount hopeless romantic, willfullness and suicidal to give Andrea the number. 

Miranda bit her lip, the cunning plan already forming in her mind. She dialed Nigel's number. "Hi Nigel. Andrea just called me."

"Oh? And?" He tried to hide his smile. 

"And what can I say? I'm in love all over again." Miranda lied. "It was wonderful of you to give her my new number." 

"No thanks are necessary. I'm just happy to do my part. Andy is a much better match for you than that woman you brought with you. You'll be able to drop those excess pounds you put on in California." 

"Nigel, I couldn't be more furious with you." Miranda snarled. "You had absolutely no right to give away my personal information. I may not have the best track record with relationships but I've at least been able to sustain one for more than two months at a time. The next time you feel the need to help someone with with perceived relationship troubles try looking inward first." 

"I... Miranda... I..." Nigel was stunned. 

"If I ever hear you utter a bad word about Jane I will ruin you. She is more real and sincere and loveable than anyone I met in forty years in the fashion industry. I am _done_ with the petty bullshit." 

Nigel's mouth fell open at the uncharacteristic swearing. 

"And if you have a problem with my weight _keep it to yourself_." Miranda paused to allow Nigel to rebut. When he didn't speak she continued. "That being said I do still value your friendship. If you think that you can still be friends with me if I continue to date Jane and eat croissants then call me once you've grown up." 

Miranda ended the call and pulled up the flight schedule from New York to Santa Barbara. 

**

Luke dipped french bread into his mother's creamy potato soup, "when's Miranda coming back?" 

Jane gently slapped his knuckles playfully with the spoon. "Stay out of there, it's not done." She shrugged, "I don't know. She said she was going to stay and oversee a few things, like a surprise inspection. How is it?" 

"Needs a little more rosemary maybe." Luke wiped his crummy fingers on his shirt. 

"Sweetheart, I buy napkins for a reason." 

"So you can lecture me about not wiping my fingers on my clothes?" He teased. 

"It certainly seems that way, doesn't it?" Jane smirked. 

"Mom, you're missing the whole episode!" Gabby called from the living room.

"I'm making dinner. Do you want me to watch Gossip Girl or do you want to eat?" Miranda asked as she shook more rosemary into the soup pot. 

"Dinner, I guess..." Gabby grumbled. 

Jane's cell phone rang. "Can you stir this for a minute?" She handed the spoon to Luke and slipped into the back room to take the call. "Hi." 

"It's good to hear your voice." Miranda sighed contentedly. "What are you up to?" 

"Making dinner. The girls are watching Gossip Girl and Luke's hovering around helping me out with the soup." 

"Mind if I come over? I just landed and I'd really like to see you." 

"Of course I don't mind. Even if I did my kids would lynch me if they found out I'd turned you away." Jane smiled. "I can expect you in about twenty minutes?" 

"I'd say thirty. Does it rain so infrequently here that Santa Barbarians don't know how to drive in it?" Miranda rolled her eyes. 

"You know it's illegal to talk on your phone while you're driving in California?" 

"I have a blutooth." Miranda said dismissively. "But if it will appease you I'll just talk to you when I get there?"

Jane smiled, "be safe. Don't hydroplane. See you soon." 

"See you." Miranda smiled. 

Jane sighed contentedly, knowing she was falling fast and hard for the beautiful, somewhat unpredictable white haired fashionista. 

Back in the kitchen Luke was still stirring the soup. "Hey mom, I think I've got it tasting right."

"Oh yeah? Let's see about that," she took the spoon from him and tasted it. "That's perfect. You added more rosemary, what else?" 

"A little extra sea salt, more garlic and paprika."

"Maybe I'll start letting you cook the family dinners." Jane mussed up his hair. 

"Let's not get carried away, mom. I think I'll stick with my usual job," he said as he picked up the bowls and spoons from the counter. 

"Oh, hey, grab an extra setting, Miranda's coming over." 

"Don't know when she's coming back, my ass." Luke laughed. "Should we wait for her then?"

"Um..." Jane paused in thought, "I guess not. She's coming from the airport and it's raining so it could take her a while. We should probably eat and then we can sit with her when she gets here." 

"When who gets here?" Lauren asked as she and Gabby joined them in the kitchen.

"Is Miranda coming?" Gabby grinned. 

"Try to control your enthusiasm, I'm liable to get jealous because you like her better." 

"We don't like her better." Gabby insisted, "she's just new and exciting and way nicer to us than Agness was."

They started eating leisurely. Jane only took half of a portion so that when Miranda arrived she could eat with her. 

The doorbell rang and Jane went to get it. She opened the door to see a somewhat tired looking Miranda smiling on the other side. "Your house always smells wonderful." 

"Come in, there's plenty left." 

"I'm going to take you up on that offer but first can we talk?" Miranda asked seriously as she took Jane's hands. "In private?"

Jane's heart started to pound. She couldn't conceive of a good outcome of this talk but she managed to nod. Miranda gave the children a distracted wave as she followed Jane to the back bedroom. 

Jane sat down on the bed and looked up at Miranda. "What's up?"

Miranda took a deep breath and began, "you were right about Andrea. I was still stuck on her. She showed up at the photoshoot in Central Park and we ended up talking and... I finally let her go. I realized that the reason I couldn't get over her was because I'd never talked to her or anyone else about how she made me feel. I had just buried it without addressing it but I finally let her go. It turned out that Nigel was trying to play matchmaker and he said insulting things about you and I just saw red. I was so mad."

Jane's head spun from the multiple directions the conversation was going. She nodded. 

"I keep trying to tell myself that it's too soon and that I should be more level headed and I should think about it longer but I haven't had the best of luck with 'playing it safe' in relationships so I'm just going to put it all out there." Miranda sat down on the bed with Jane and took her hands again, "Jane Constance Adler, you make me ridiculously happy and I'm in love with you." 

Jane stared at Miranda with wide eyes for several long moments before blinking and feeling tears roll down her cheeks. 

"Is that... a good response?" Miranda bit her lip. 

Jane threw her arms around Miranda and held her tightly. "I love you too." She whispered into Miranda's ear, "I'm so glad you love me."

Miranda smiled and hugged her back, "how could I resist you?"

Jane cupped Miranda's cheeks and pulled her in for a deep, sensuous kiss. "Not to cut the moment short," Jane said as she ran a finger along Miranda's bottom lip, "but coming into the house saying 'we have to talk' is apt to make children of divorce fear break-up." 

"Well, they come by their neuroses honestly." Miranda teased. 

"Hey!" Jane pouted playfully. "To be honest... you came in bandying about the 'we need to talk... in private' and I kind of thought you were going to break up with me."

Miranda captured Jane's lips, "we are going to work on your confidence in yourself. Remember, it's 90% attitude." 

Jane grinned, "and 10% knowing you love me?" 

"Maybe it's 90% knowing I love you and 10% attitude." 

"Is it wrong that I want to kick my kids out and just have my way with you?" Jane laughed, pulling Miranda against her body. 

**

Over the course of the winter Jane and Miranda came out to most of their families and friends. Miranda met Jane's group of girlfriends who hadn't understood until they met her why exactly they'd been blown off so many times. Jane met Sophia Loren and Donatella Versace. Miranda had even somehow struck up a friendship with Emily who reported that Nigel was still being a little girl about the whole mess with Andy. 

One chilly December morning close to Christmas Adam walked onto the property sporting a Christmas present for Jane and feeling good about himself. That was until he caught sight of Miranda. 

Miranda poured herself a cup of coffee and glanced over at the dumbstruck architect. She cleared her throat and he looked up to her eyes. "I'm supposed to be practicing holding my temper and asking questions before lashing out. So I will tell you once: keep your eyes north of the border and I won't break my perfect record by tearing you a new one."

Adam stuttered and turned away. Before he could get too far away from Miranda he felt something under his arm slide away from his grasp. He flipped around and saw Miranda holding the card that had been attached to the wrapped present. 

Miranda ran her finger over the envelope flap. "I'm not going to find any inappropriate declarations of love in this envelope, am I?" 

"Miranda," Jane scolded gently as she walked up to them. She took the envelope from her hand and handed it to Adam, "torturing Adam counts as being mean." 

"God, you _are_ a buzzkill." Miranda teased and pouted.

"Yeah, you're stuck with me." Jane smiled. 

"I should get out back to see how it's going." Adam announced uncomfortably. 

"Wait. Aren't you going to give Jane her Christmas present?" Miranda gestured to the package. 

"Miranda." Jane scolded again. 

"No, no, she's right." Adam offered the two women a weak smile. "Merry Christmas, Jane."

"Thank you, Adam." Jane accepted the gift and watched him walk away before turning to Miranda. "Sweetheart, right now you're at an eight, can we try to take it down to a three?"

Miranda pursed her lips and sipped her coffee. "Compromise? Five?" Miranda sighed when she Jane stared at her pointedly. "What? The world thinks I'm despicable anyway, why disappoint?" 

"There's nothing you can do for Lucas, you can't contact him. You know that the FTC is just looking for an excuse."

"I was with the man for ten years, I should be able to offer financial assistance. Caroline told me that his car was reposessed last week." Miranda frowned. "I tried to pay for Caroline's spring semester and Lucas told me he'd drag me to court if I tried to interfere. The man is too damn stubborn." 

" _That_ doesn't sound like anybody I know..." 

"The jerk would rather take out a high interest loan than just let me pay for Caroline's college education. There's no reason for him to go into debt when I can do it." Miranda insisted. 

"Come on, Miranda, be reasonable. If you were in Lucas's position you'd go into hock before you took money from him." Jane rubbed Miranda's back. "Things have a way of working themselves out." 

"I'm having the beginnings of an idea..." 

"An evil one or a good one?" Jane watched Miranda's face for a hint. 

"I'd say it straddles the middle." Miranda smirked. 

"Speaking of straddling..." Jane batted her eyelashes, "is this plan something that has to go into motion immediately or can I steal you for a little mid-morning fun?" 

Miranda grinned, "aren't you going to open your present?" She teased. 

Jane set it on the table and grabbed Miranda by the hand, "it can wait." 

**

"Hey mom," Caroline said after Miranda picked up, "the school informed me that I was awarded the Alexander McQueen memorial scholarship..."

"Oh sweetie, congratulations." 

"Yeah, here's the thing. I googled it and it doesn't exist. So... thank you." Caroline smiled, "Cass and I were afraid that dad was going to... well you know. So... we just think that was really classy of you." 

"Hey Bobbsey, I don't know what you're talking about. You obviously earned that scholarship." Miranda insisted. "Congratulations." 

"Okay. If that's how you want to play it." Caroline smiled again, "dinner tonight?"

**

The construction hit a few snags as Adam tried to push off overseeing onto one of the other architects and they had a water main burst but it was finally finished in early April. 

Miranda and Jane lay out in the spring sun. Jane still wrapped in a sweater, Miranda down to a t-shirt. "You know what I'd like to do right now?" Miranda ran her finger down Jane's arm. 

"What?" Jane bit her lip. 

"I'd like to go for a swim and I'd like you to come with me." Miranda sat up and pulled her shirt off. 

Jane propped herself up, "you're a madwoman. It's barely sixty degrees." 

"It'll be invigorating." Miranda insisted as she kicked off her shoes. "I'm going in with or without you. So, Jane, how about it: are you a man or a mouse?"

"Are those my only two options?" Jane laughed. 

Miranda slipped her Versace slacks down her legs and stood before Jane in her underwear. Slowly, she reached behind her back and unhooked her bra, letting it fall away before bending and shimmying out of her thong. 

Jane whimpered, scarcely able to contain her lust at seeing her lover standing naked in front of her. Jane closed her eyes, "god, you are such a bad influence!" She pulled the sweater off and hastily removed her pants, t-shirt, bra and underwear. "I'm counting on you to warm me up." 

"I'll keep you warm." Miranda promised as she stepped up onto the diving board. 

"Oh god, you're not really going to... are you? I can't watch!" Jane called as she covered her eyes with her hand, peeking through the fingers in disbelief. 

Miranda took one bounce and dove into the pool. Jane watched the water in awe and jumped when Miranda came up with a splash by her feet. 

"Come on in," Miranda pushed her hair back, "the water's fine." 

"I'm going to regret this..." Jane squeezed her eyes, held her nose and did a canonball into the pool. 

As she came up, already starting to shiver, she felt Miranda's warm arms encircle her waist and pull her close. She opened her eyes to see Miranda smiling at her. "Absolutely beautiful..." 

Jane captured Miranda's lips pushing her back toward the wall of the pool and covering her body with her own. Jane's hand snaked down Miranda's thigh and she raked her fingernails up the soft flesh. 

Miranda moaned as Jane's fingers slipped between her legs and ran along slick wetness. Miranda wrapped her arms around Jane's waist and Jane pushed three fingers into Miranda. Miranda groaned and rolled her hips against Jane as she laid her head on Jane's shoulder and moved with her. 

"I love your ability to talk me into things I know are crazy," Jane whispered in a low, sultry voice as she thrust into Miranda. "My life would suck without you." 

"If you break out into Kelly Clarkson I don't think I'll be orgasming today..." Miranda teased as she bucked her hips with Jane's movements. 

"Shut up." Jane grinned, "you talk too much." Jane pushed deeper inside Miranda. 

Miranda cried out, she gripped the tile by the edge of the pool and held Jane tighter as she felt her orgasm closing in on her. "Oh god," she groaned, "oh god..." 

"I can't get enough of you," Jane said softly as she ran her tongue along Miranda's neck and started to suck gently on her pulse point. 

Miranda bit her lip against the scream that threatened as her orgasm overtook her. Miranda clung to Jane, groaning and moaning as she felt all the little sparks rushing to her extremeties. "Oh... God..." 

"I usually go by Jane, but God works for me." Jane laughed. 

"Feeling cocky, are we?" Miranda grinned. Miranda's hands slid over Jane's breasts causing Jane to moan her appreciation. Miranda let her legs down and lifted Jane up. Miranda's finger made circles over Jane's clit. 

Jane buried her face in Miranda's neck. 

Miranda nibbled on Jane's ear as she continued to stroke the little bundle of nerves. Jane moved easily with Miranda in the water, her whole body flushing with arousal. She moaned as Miranda expertly applied pressure in all the right places. 

Jane's grip on Miranda tightened as she felt her orgasm building. When her body let go and her muscles contracted, her mind shut off from rational thought. The resulting rush was peaceful and calming and she stayed in Miranda's arms for who knew how long. 

Jane came back to the moment upon feeling Miranda's lips moving against her ear. "Hm?"

"I said I love you," Miranda murmured again. 

Jane smiled and gave Miranda a squeeze, "love you, too."

**

A month and a half later in early June Jane decided to throw a pool party. They hadn't managed to get all-slash-most of their families and friends together in one place and Jane thought that an informal pool party would be the perfect get together. 

"You're basically throwing a Coming Out Ball. It's like your debutante ball." Miranda teased as she licked her umpteenth envelope and tossed it into the pile with the other finished invitations for Jane to stamp.

"Did you have a debutante ball?" Jane asked distractedly as she painstakingly placed a stamp in the corner. 

"Are you kidding? I grew up in the bad part of Newark. At my senior prom two people got knifed." Miranda grabbed some of the sealed pile from Jane, "it's going to take forever if you put all the stamps on like that."

"Two people did _not_ get knifed at your senior prom!" Jane objected. 

"They did. That was the year that we had a gang war. I'm not making this up. The hispanic kids were De Oro and the retaliating white kids were 'white wins today' which they abbreviated to WWII." Miranda put another invitation in the outgoing pile. "My mother wanted me to transfer but I was so close to graduating that I talked her out of it." 

"The worst thing that happened at my high school was a massive food fight. The whole cafeteria got detention for a week." Jane furrowed her brow, "maybe there were a couple of fist fights..."

"I suppose I did get my Debutante Ball, though," Miranda continued with a smile, "when I held my first annual Runway charity ball." 

"I'm glad you get to come to my Debutante Ball." Jane gave Miranda's hand a gentle squeeze and then pulled another box of invitations onto the table.

"For heaven's sake! How many people are you inviting?" Miranda demanded. 

"You always invite triple the amount of people you actually expect to show up." Jane shrugged. 

"You mean when you throw a party, not only do you not have crashers but all the people on the _guest list_ don't even come?" Miranda furrowed her brow in confusion.

Jane laughed, "my dear, you have such a skewed view of the world. And I wouldn't have it any other way." Jane kissed Miranda's hand, "so are you going to help me seal and stamp or what?" 

"I'm opting for the 'or what,'" Miranda announced, getting up from the table. "At least until I drink some water. You're running me dry."

**

The weather was a beautiful 89 degrees on the day of Jane's party. Jane grabbed a glass of wine from a tray as a waiter passed by. "Hey Sally," Jane hugged her, "I'm so glad you could make it." 

"Like I was going to miss your party." Sally nudged her, "and pass up this wonderful opportunity to meet the woman who makes more money than Jake." 

"Oh god," Jane laughed, "how do you even know that?"

"Well, apart from googling her Jake called Ted and blubbed to him about the whole thing when the kids told him how serious it was." Sally sipped her wine. "So, it is serious? I just ask because I saw how many times she's been divorced and I don't want to see you get hurt again." 

"Believe me, I had the same reservations that you did. I jumped to the conclusion that it was because of her which it seems is fallacious." Jane shrugged, "I've never specifically asked her why she got divorced but from everything I've heard it was mostly about working long hours and immasculating her husbands by making money. _I_ 'm not threatened and she's retired." 

"Well I'm happy for you, Jane." 

Jake and Ted joined the women. Jake held two wine glasses. "Oh... I see you already have one..." 

"I do." Jane nodded, sipping her drink. 

"I just wanted to say thank you for inviting me despite the childish way I've been acting." Jake scuffed his foot, "and Ted did not put me up to saying that." 

"Some lawyer you are!" Ted objected with a laugh, "I tell him not to tell you and he all but admits it." 

"Your heart was in the right place." Sally chuckled and kissed Ted on the cheek. 

"Hey Janie, I think my heart was in the right place too." Jake tapped his cheek. 

"Take it up with Sally, she's the one awarding 'heart-in-right-place' kisses." Jane motioned to Sally. Sally laughed and leaned in and kissed Jake's cheek. "All fair?" 

Jake scoffed, "no offense to Sally -- Ted, you've got a hot wife -- but I was looking for a kiss from mine." 

"Then maybe you should get married." Jane suggested with a mischievous grin. 

"You hear this? Six months with the Dragon Lady and you hear how she's talking to me?" Jake gestured to Jane. 

Jane pushed his hand down, "first of all, it's eight months. Second of all, her name is _Miranda_. Third of all, I've always talked to you like that you just never listened to me." Jane poked him in the chest with a well-manicured finger but Jake's eyes were elsewhere. 

Jane turned to see Miranda exiting the house. Miranda turned for a moment to close the door and she turned. Her pale skin contrasting beautifully with the crimson Prada bikini and the brown and pink batik sarong wrapped around her shapely hips made her the center of attention as she crossed the lawn. 

Miranda had bought an arsenal of gym equipment to while away the winter months and use it as an excuse to consume baked goods daily. At first Jane thought that Miranda was being obsessive and superficial but as she watched the tight skin move over Miranda's abdominal muscles she wasn't complaining. 

Miranda stepped up to the group and wrapped an arm around Jane. Jane grinned and leaned in for a kiss. "Sweetie, where are the extra towels?" 

"Oh shoot, I moved them." Jane furrowed her brow, "I put them... you know what? Check under the dining room table."

"Alright, I'm not going to ask." Miranda patted Jane on the back. "I'll be right back." 

Sally, Ted and Jake craned to watch Miranda walk back toward the house. Sally turned back to Jane, "aren't we supposed to hate women our age who look that good?" 

"Only if you're not tapping that. _What_?" She held up her hand for a high five and Ted high fived her. 

"Well played, Ms. Adler." 

"' _Tapping that_?'" Jake repeated with incredulity. 

"What? I watch teen dramas with the girls. Some of it... seeps in." Jane sipped her drink embarrassedly.


End file.
